Unchained Memories

Fuck

2008-10-22T02:54:00.001+08:00

Fuck me, right in my fuckin brain.

SHIT!

mind in the gutter

2008-10-19T19:08:00.001+08:00

Yes, I'm alive. I'm just working too much.

You know how it feels when you stumble upon an interesting blog and you start wondering why you've been abandoning yours, it's probably best if you just updated a little so people would know that you're still alive and kicking.

Hi, you reading? :)

Let me pour you a drink.

Time's a huge issue these days. I'm not as busy as everyone assumes but the schedule is as tight as it can get. But lately it's all been good (except the fact that I was sick and got two jabs on the ass by a lady doc).

Filmed a music video a week ago, I hope no one would ever see that. It's probably going to be aired just once anyway. And then I went up to Berjaya Hills, previously known as Bkt Tinggi (admit it, it's quite a dumb name) to help promote this online wedding contest titled Love Me 'Do.

I'd have preferred Love Me 'Do Me. I don't know.

My very much belated Birthday party.

It's a Sunday. I went to a club called Marketplace last night. Total gay hangout. You can bat those eye lashes and feel a queer's neck. Not that I have anything against it. But I have nothing good to say about this either. It's sorta like La Queen without the queens, it's all about beefed up bears dancings and some rich-and-famous designers socializing with, well, gay men.

Met this bunch of med students. Got myself interested in a (relatively) young boy who seems to have more things to share than he's letting out. I'd have really liked him if I were still in college. Working takes my life away.

BUT THANK GOD FOR ANNUAL LEAVES.

I managed to take a few days off next week so I'll be running off to Krabi Island with the folks. It's a much needed break, trust me. When I come back, I'll be tanned, sexed up and better than ever. My batteries need to be recharged, and a few days on the beach and some good old diving and swimming around and jungle trekking might do just the trick.

When I get back, I'll have to finish off as much work as possible and run off to Perth, Australia for a travel documentary. Joining me is a very cool cameraman so things look promising from here. I can't wait to meet up with some friends. Of course, the fact that I've never been there before makes it that much more exciting.

How was your month?

Kev C.

88th on 080808

2008-08-09T01:00:00.001+08:00

Welcome.

This is the new unchamories, condensed into an unimaginative 'ucmrs'. I did not give myself too much time when I changed the URL a few months ago. Let's not go into details and may the bygones stay in the past.

Oh, before I really put everything behind, the name 'unchamories' ~~made famous by ME~~ has been taken by another blogger. I'm not sure who and I do not care, but if I do find out, I'll ask the person why he/she took it. Nothing more than fleeting curiosity, I'd say.

I was reading CJ's blog a while ago, don't ask me why. I did not read in between the lines or even pay much attention to the pictures. I just read about what he wrote, perhaps just like the way you'd read my stuff, you read, but you hardly register. And if you do, 'oh, okay'.

After I read a few more blogs, I missed my own. And I came back. I'm not sure how often I'd stop by or what I'll inject into the new ucmr, but it's good to be back. It feels like home, to me.

I turned 21 two days ago in an airport of a foreign country. A grade 8 typhoon was raging outside and my flight was delayed by 13 hours. My ridiculous (it's beyond stupid) SIM card does not support international roaming and I missed every single one of my birthday wishes. So you can probably imagine what everyone's reaction was when I came back a day late.

I missed my own birthday party, damn weather.

But still, being 21 means I'm officially an adult now. One who's going to have to take matters into his own hands and be aware of his responsibilities. There's no going back. And I'm not too sure what is ahead of me in the industry but I'm rather eager to find out.

Let's see what happened in the past few months.

***RECAP***

Jasmine and I left Venus after it ended.
She went to college, I went to the Breakfast Show.

The Breakfast Show team at the BIG 10 Party.
Jess Wan Ying, Syafique, Sheila, Adam & the new guy.

Shaz's birthday ambush was quite a surprise.
Even for the ambushers.

Another ambush target: Joveena Francis.

Group performance at KL Tower.

Acting workshop with Sazzy Falak & Ashraf Sinclair.
And of course the beautiful Aishah.

That's it. Congrats to Henry for making it to becoming the new host for Quickie. Congrats to Sariah for getting a new travel show. Congrats to anyone who has had great news lately. Congrats to me for coming back.

Happy birthday,
Kevin C.

.previously on Venus.

2008-06-27T21:56:00.001+08:00

i'm going to work, honey

2008-06-25T19:47:00.001+08:00

I start work as an Executive Broadcast Journalist starting next Tuesday at The Breakfast Show. The money wasn't there. Slightly more than 2k but as everyone keeps telling me, that's pretty swell for a diploma fresh grad with only one month of working experience on an ended show. Gargh, I'll have to watch my spendings. No more 1,399 jackets. It's time to save money.

It's still okay I suppose, if TV doesn't work out (which it so will), I'll move over to PR considering how much contacts I've already got and Selina Yeop Jr offered such nice pay. (ha-ha) And for HR contract, I get to enjoy unlimited medical benefits and also get bonuses and all that crap. AND I get to travel to a lotta places with the TBS team. So gawd, please make this worthwhile.

Damn, passion is a bitch sometimes.

Well, this is the new Kevin. Fingers crossed everything will go well. If all things go well, I'll be living like a king in 5 years. If things don't go well, 8 years. Hahah!

Ganbateh, bitches.
Kev C.

i was still new okay!

2008-06-09T22:52:00.003+08:00

This was such a funny episode. It's not exactly a bad one, but it's not up to our normal standards either. I think Sariah took a huge risk when she let me run the story all by myself when it was actually one of my first self-produced episodes.

Look at her face, she looked so unsure! Hahahahah!!

Go on, laugh your asses off =(

Blah blah blah,
Kev C.

.people all come together.

2008-05-24T18:18:00.000+08:00

I hardly pray these days, but when I do,
I ask for the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.
The courage to change the things I can.
And the wisdom to tell the difference.

*

I cringed when I heard you say 'I love you'. We hardly know each other. We didn't talk for any more than 20 minutes before we got down to business. And the only thing we had in common, was the timing we shared when it comes to ejaculating. And boy, that was a climax I wish I never had. Especially if I had known that love was anywhere near the corner of your mind.

The next day when I woke up, I almost forgotten exactly how you look like. The only thing on my mind was work, and two shoots in a row that would require me to memorize a lot of words. You see, being an intern at a TV station that is short in manpower directly translate into being a legal staff that doesn't get the pay that would be legally agreed upon. You get up at nine and work your behind off until late evening and you get dinner, get cleaned up, and get laid. And by that, I mean getting sleep.

So it would actually be rather crazy of me to stay if the producer thought a puny amount of salary would prevent me from leaving the production. Fortunately, I am not completely stupid. Unfortunately, neither is my producer. But when I approached the executive producer with an amount in my mind, I finally understand that every office has its political drama.

And at the end of that day in the office, it becomes difficult to tell who is on your side. But despite all the drama and disagreements, it would be easier to find friends if one understands that there's only two kinds of coworkers. The ones who care for you, and the ones who couldn't care less.

You see, all over the place, people seek for that connection. The kind that would blossom into friendship. And also the kind that would lead us to the right path. We seek for the company we so desperately yearns for. And we hope that someday, someone would be there for us. But what needs to be made clear is that nothing lasts forever, and the ones who know this best, are the ones who want to be left alone.

Pictures from work and around:

Datuk Dr Aziz, the head Gynecologist in Malaysia,
Bernie Chan and Kevin in a bright shirt.

Saiful The Great, the editor who does all the work.

Meet Sariah, my producer who does not come across
as a great boss, but does a great job as a friend.

And Sam was there too with the PR members
who were in charge of the huge Venus cross-over.

The people who love their fags.

And the people who love to pose.

I look like such a sepet.

Making the gays out of my editor and studio director.

Super team members!

Oh wait, this is not from work now is it?

Jasmine was the director of the Football Lingo
episode. But she didn't want to be on screen.

Adele came to Venus to talk about her near death experiences.

And Sam came to help me with another shoot I directed.

Then people all fall apart,
Kev C.

the other end of the tunnel

2008-05-06T14:51:00.000+08:00

Dr Sheikh Muzaphar was on Venus :)

We were so bored we grew heads.

Camwhoring as usual.

Grace is the host for today!

And I'm the guest. Ho ho ho.

Oh! I had my first stand-upper. But I'm not gonna post it up here because I don't think it was a strong episode. I'll be moving to The Breakfast Show starting end of the month as Venus is ending. I'm not sure how much work that would be but I know how many countries I get to travel to and how many freebies I'd be able to score. Most importantly, it's one of the most watched show on TV.

I thought I was going to have sex two days ago. As a matter of fact I was so close to. But I couldn't. And then I went to this website to look for company. And I was offered plenty of attention and opportunities. Again, I couldn't. And then I finally realized that some people come into your life for a season, some for a reason. But you came and took all the other seasons away. Our spring was wonderful, but summer is over now and we missed out on autumn. And now all of a sudden, it's cold, so cold that everything is freezing over. Our love fell asleep, and the snow took it by surprise. But if you fall asleep in the snow, you don't feel death coming.

Come back, come back to me,
Kev C.

i am NOT in denial

2008-04-26T11:17:00.001+08:00

Tyra was SO pouting.

The guy in blue is Nazrol from News.

The peeps from Venus.

I actually didn't drink that much.

A few days after Tyra's birthday, Aishah, Jasmine and I
went to Bangsar to get our hair done at Shawn Cutler's,
the sponsor for Venus and also The Breakfast Show.

And I got my hair colored, mahogany red.

Please don't fuck at me for acting childish,
I just find that UFO thingy real cool.

Ta-dah!

On Saturday, I drove my family up to Thailand.

The view from my room's window.
The streets looked quite dead but it really wasn't.

Esmond, my other brother.

And of course, the one the girls are constantly drooling after.

Some pictures I took outside of work:

After the premiere of Definitely, Maybe.

Tengku Ian was a bit delusional ;)

And this is after the premiere of Fool's Gold.

Wait la, we weren't even ready yet.

1, 2... Snap!And that's all for the night folks.

Tax & You (TX: 23rd April)

You have no idea how happy I was
when the episode received above average feedback.
Thanks again Bern!

Are you?
Kevin C.

Jasmine's Much Anticipated VO

2008-04-19T00:00:00.001+08:00

Gimme Some Sugar

2008-04-17T13:05:00.003+08:00

I hope my smile can distract you

I hope my fists can fight for two

So it never has to show

And you'll never know

I hope my love can blind you

I hope my arms can bind you

So you won't have to see

What we've grown to be

One may think we're alright

But we need pills to sleep at night

We need lies to get it through the day

We're not okay

One may think I'm doing fine

But if I have to lay it on the line

I'm losing ground with every passing day

I'm not okay

But that's one thing I would never, ever, say to you

The Perishers - Pills

I drove up to Laundry at The Curve on Tuesday night for Satira's 26th birthday. Pretty good turnout. More than 20 of her old flames came, which would be scary if they knew that they all went for her. It was fortunate that they didn't as we had quite an enjoyable time. The girl surely knew how to pick men. The gifts she received were... um, major. Well, pictures!

All hail Queen Tyra!

The Broadcast Jornalists of Venus y'all.

(from left) Kevin, Grace, Jasmine and Satira.

JP from The Breakfast Show and Channel [V].
He couldn't believe that all the boys were Tyra's exes either.

The girls doing a SATC walk.

Butt (the guy in pink) kept asking if I was a host.
For his own reasons, he swore he's seen me somewhere.

At the end of the evening, we were so totally wasted.

Oh, and guess what, Aishah, Jasmine and I were lying on the couch being whorey for the cameras and there was this bunch of guys at the opposite table staring at us. I was telling Aishah how they were checking her out until one of the guys came and asked me for my name and for a drink. You should so have seen the look on the girls' faces. The funniest thing is, the guy was almost 40. And two days ago I was talking to I wouldn't mind the others on the table though. One of them in particular was strikingly handsome. You can't really demand too much if you're looking for a quick fuck I guess. Or maybe I just looked like an easy prey.

More pictures coming up, I suppose. Jasmine's camera is being a bitch. We have the Angkasawan guy coming to do a recording for the show in a while so, yeah, I'll probably hog him for a photo, or something else. Blah. I wish you were here.

And call me daddy,
Kev C.

Because I Miss The View

2008-04-13T15:48:00.000+08:00

This time, this place, misused, mistakes

Too long, too late

Who was I to make you wait?

Just one chance, just one breath

Just in case there's just one left

Cause you know that I love yo

I have loved you all along

And I miss you

Been far away for far too long

I keep dreaming you'll be with me and you'll never go

I'll stop breathing if I don't see you anymore

Nickelback - Far Away

I had the biggest urge to go out just now. Maybe I'd wait for you downstairs until you come down. Maybe I'll wait until tomorrow morning if you don't show up tonight. But I didn't. Maybe after all I was too chicken shit. Maybe people like me really don't deserve to have second chances.

Okaaaay, before I scare people off with my ramblings... it's been a few crazy weeks at work. I'm finally here typing this because it's a weekend I'm not out and about. I actually 'worked' today as well. Sending a few emails to the guests that are coming to Venus next week. I wish the job didn't require me to call people or receive calls on weekends. It does.

Working at Venus has been as fun as it has been hectic. Waking up at 8:30 every morning hasn't been difficult at all (well, as long as I sleep before 1am the night before). I've moved back to somewhere in Damansara Jaya so going to work takes less than 20 minutes, which I'm quite happy about. Staying in Ampang was crazy because the traffic every morning could made me drive more than 3 hours everyday.

Back to Venus (I accidentaly typed Benus there, lol), the workload is getting heavier but Jasmine and I have finally got a hang of it. We can actually still go on Facebook at work and surf unrelated website for personal pleasure during work hours. Oh, did I mention how much I like the people there? My colleagues are amazingly hilarious. My team lead brings us to lunch once or twice a week and sometimes we'll just have brunch outside the studio because Sheraton Subang is our FnB sponsor. They have really good fish qiches, by the way.

Free food (occasionally anyways), free concert and movie tickets, free hair and spa treatment, free CDs and magazines, meeting highly influential people and broadening social horizons. Yeah, those are the good part. Weird hours, last minute efforts, editing videos, running live shows, dealing with stuck-up people, getting used to cigarettes. Those are the low notes. And oh, before you think it's not that bad, wait till you see our post-mortem. Because the show is broadcasted live, a single wrong button will get you into deadly trouble.

I'm going to Thailand next weekend to shop and probably get a massage (gawd I need that) with my family. Haven't seen them much lately. Working at the station is so busy that I hardly feel that three weeks has past. Well, at least it helps me not think of my relationships.

Little Miss Jasmine's story is finally going on television.

So watch out for her (or her voice) on Venus.

Monday (14th April) on NTV7 at 11am.

Of me and you,

Kevin C.

lights will guide us home

2008-04-11T14:56:00.004+08:00

I really like the story. Heck, I even like Nurul, the former drug addict I interviewed. The 3 minute clip you watch at the front is actually the first story I produced here on Venus. Remember three weeks ago when I first started I was told to cover a wedding? Yeah, this is the result. Aishah thought the story was pretty decent for a first-timer. Well, I put quite a lot of effort in the script as well as the editing, so thankfully the results show. I just hope the same amount of enthusiasm and passion can be infused into the other stories I'm assigned to. I'm really not that hyped for "Do Celebs Earn A Lot?" and the 'Tax & You" episodes coming up. Gawd, I haven't even started doing my pre-scripts yet. Argh!

The producer from the Edisi Siasat department asked me today if I wanted to join the newscasting group after I finish my internship after hearing me speak Mandarin the other day. It was flattering, since I started out studying mass communication for the sake of reading news. But after seeing how they work... Hmmm... I don't know. Venus can be about lifestyle so I can be more relaxed and chilled, if I go into the news department, I'd probably look as old as my dad when I hit 25. Plus, I get all sorts of freebies running a lifestyle program (like getting my hair done for free even though there's not much of it) But then again, news anchors get allowances.

What do YOU say?

And I will try to fix you,
Kev C.

I Don't See What Anyone Can See

2008-04-01T13:11:00.001+08:00

Collecting vox pops at Pavilion, KL.

Special thanks to Shaz for the pictures.

In anyone else but you,
Kev C.

Work Is Nuts

2008-03-25T21:45:00.001+08:00

I said bye to Andre and moved out on Sunday.
Not gonna let y'all know where though. Just far away.

And I went out with Shaz.

And that's about it.
Nothing much, other than his friends who spoke Malay.

Then I went to work with Jasmine.

And she's so tired she couldn't even open her eyes.
Don't they both look like they're enjoying themselves?
These girls hardly finish their Chicken Salads.

Oh, our team lead bought us lunch for the first day.

That's my team lead on the left and Gracie on the right.

And you can see Grace going down on her corn.

And I had half a chicken!

This is what we wear to work!
Haha, see? Nothing fancy.

Just in case you want to read a piece of something something, I'm currently a broadcast journalist and production assistant at NTV7. I'm working under the production team of Venus, Malaysia's only English talk show, hosted by Aisha Sinclair. I actually thought interns are only there to do paper work and help around carrying things and do research, I was wrong.

The first thing I was assigned to do was to clean the white board, which had stuff written all over it in permanent marker ink. Right after that, I was told to run a VoxPop at Pavilion. And after a few minutes of discussion, I was assigned FOUR VoxPop assignments, including topics such as bone density, girls and their wheels, toxic friend and another one which I cannot remember at the moment, and I'm not willing to bring out my diary at home. I was assigned an entire story titled 'Tax & Me' because Tax Day is just around the corner. So I had to scout for someone from LHDN to come on set for a live interview. AND I had to find a taxing consultant from a famous company. CJ didn't pick up his phone so I resorted to Bern. Thankfully the PR lady from both companies are nice and speak English, or I'd have died.

Tuesday, I was assigned to do a full story research on people who have overcome drug addiction. Ans Jasmine was assigned to do VoxPops at OneUtama that day herself so she was out and I had to run around in the office. I helped run the live show in the morning and typed another thousand emails after lunch.

Today (Wed) I was told to cover the story on ex drug addicts. So I'm going out on Saturday with a personal cameraman and recording my own show. Can you believe that? Yeah, Jasmine is recording her own show next Tuesday. We had to do voice training and posture and decide how to shoot the subject as well as ourselves and submit it after three days from the shoot so that it can go on air three days later. I also ran the show with Jasmine from the studio because it was prerecorded. But we still had to sit there for half an hour to indicate the commercial department whenever we have commercials. Basically it's playing the tape and calling the office back and forth and counting down. It was intense, but hugely amusing.

So I'll be going to Pavilion tomorrow for my first outdoor VoxPop assignment. Special thanks to Bern, Adele and Jovinna for helping out with the projects. Two of these folks will be making it onto the TV ;) I'm having an audition with a few male celebrities on Friday because the program is looking for an extra host. And gawd, Kevin Zahri sounds so unhot on the phone.

Overall, work is crazy hectic and the scope is vast, but I'm happy that I'm in a team where we ALWAYS help each other help. And the people from The Breakfast Show are pretty nice to us as well, even though I only talk to the guy there. Deadlines come up just as fast as ideas and I'm expected to bring in Sharifah Aini and Fauziah Latiff on the same episode live AND the Wife of Prime Minister, Jeanne Abdullah for the episode after that. So yeah, calling and emailing and typing invitation letters are my new least favorite things to do.

I'm your nutcracker,
Kev C.
kevin.ntv7@gmail.com

Tell Me Why

2008-03-23T01:20:00.002+08:00

These are just for my friends' viewing displeasure. So if you're not really that close to me or if you're offended by excessive pictures of Kevin, please click here to leave.

March Picture Update ;)

Avenue K, with Jasmine (and Eman).

Jack Lim's farewell @ Italianese, Gardens.

Astro's Annual Game Fest.
The night before Naomi's Birthday, I went

to Laundry at The Curve to check out an event.

Also, met Amy and Karen.
Who recognize me from a KDU event I hosted last October.

From Mel's Apartment, Subang.

If you trust me enough, it's the first time

I actually took pictures naked. Well, since I grew a brain.

After the last class of Dip-MC March 2006.

We went to KFC to have lunch together.

Aren't we all glad that college is over?
I'm gonna miss (some of) these folks.

Are we fierce enough for you?
Brace us, Malaysia.

It ain't nothing but a heartache,

Kev C

I'll Let The Music Do The Talking

2008-03-17T04:21:00.004+08:00

Love never dies a natural death

It dies cos we don't know how to replenish its source
It dies of blindness and errors and betrayals

It dies of weariness, of witherings, and of tarnishings.

I don't know why we all hang on to something we know we're better off letting go. It's like we're scared to lose what we don't even really have. Some of us say we rather have that something than absolutely nothing. But the truth is, "to have it halfway is harder than not having it at all".

Too often, the things you covet the most are the things you can never have. Desires leave us heartbroken, it wears us out. Desires that cannot be fulfilled can even drive someone crazy. But as tough as wanting something can be, the people who suffer the most, are those who don't know what they want.

You know what it is that you want.
You're just too afraid to admit it cos you're afraid of failing.
Fuck that.
Fuck your fears.
You know what you want.
And that's a hell of a lot more than most other people.
So don't be afraid or ashamed
Just go out and get it.

Oh, check this out. I cried the first time I watched it a few years ago. I cried last night when I watched it the second time. The whole family drama really gets to me. And well, at least Ning can act way better than Siti. Oh wells, they're both married now. Just load the video and watch/listen!

Please don't stop the music,
Kev C.

The Most Of Every Day

2008-03-15T00:19:00.007+08:00

It has been a while since I came here just to blog about things as mundane as my everyday life. If you have noticed, yes, I've made some changes to the blog posts so that 1) I can get some peace of mind and 2) I wouldn't have to worry about random people asking me how I'm doing.

I do appreciate you reading this. Flattered, I am. But please please don't come up to me and ask me how things between me and you-know-who are going or how I'm coping with the breakup. Trust me, I'm fine. I'm better than fine. I'm free. And so is he.

Back to not talking about him, here's what I've been doing for the past few weeks.

My Film Group. Meet the Cool Beans Production Crew.

We were actually quite exhausted with the shooting.

Well, Jasmine and I were a little more tired because we went
for a little swim when the rest was taking their breaks.

The two retards posing before going into the
ice-cold blue. We took a lot of naked pictures.
Lucky you I lost them.

Besides Film, I had to interview Will for my
News-Writing final assignment. And I bought him
Starbucks because he'd been nice all the while.

A nice guy with a great sense of humor.
Too bad, ladies. He's taken.

And I finally settled in with Andre.
Meet my new roommate.

Er, soon-to-be-ex-roommate.
I'm moving to somewhere really far from PJ for work
and also to stop myself from doing stupid things.

On the 7th of March, I traveled to Kuantan
in Arthur's car to attend Ms Naomi's wedding. We stayed in
a motel ran by Daniel's grams. Here's the beach.

Yeah, it didn't look that fun or inviting to me as well.

So I guess Mel wasn't that left out after all.

She probably had to visit the doctor's anyway.
From how she looks in this picture, she probably
needs a house call more than I did.

I was being a little emotional.

Pardon my emo-ness.
I thought I'd make it to the beach with someone.

But I guess friends are good enough. They can
give you great company with loadsa laughter.
Even without the sex.

Because we're just humans, after all.
Small, tiny humans. With big, complicated emotions.

I still am an easily jealous person who can't afford a DSLR.
So when you look at this picture...
You think I'd be thinking:
"Wow, nice camera! Nice pictures!"
But I was actually thinking:
"You effing loaded beyotches.."

Alright, we finally made it to the dinner.
In fact, we were the firsts to have made it there.

The other Malaysians following "Malaysian Time Rule"
were obvs late. Which means we had time to camwhore.

Prime example? Me and ma lady friend Adele.

Both of us wore Malay costumes.
Me likey myself in baju melayu biggie time.

The food was finger licking good. Even though I didn't literally use any of my fingers. I had three plates of scented rice with loads of very very VERY yummeh spicy food. It was the first time I had a totally spicy meal. Heck, it was the first time I attended a Malay wedding. Everything was red hot (even the drink was rose syrup, and you thought Chinese were hardcore Red arses) but the food was just heavenly. I loved every last bit of the spiciness. So yeah, who has some curry to offer?

Oh, we got Ms Naomi and Lars a little bit of something.Knowing me, I had to pose with it.

Well, at least we made it to see the bride and groom
at the end of the dinner.
Ms Naomi was practically telling everyone that
we were her students. I guess she really loved teaching.
Congrats to the both of them. Even though I wasn't
feeling too alright when they used Better Together as one
of their wedding songs.

Before heading back, we posed together for
some not-really-formal-but-who-cares group pictures.

Wait till you see the others.
(From left) Arthur, Adele, Jeaney, me, Divya, Shivani,
Daniel and my lovely team lead Eman.

So yeah, now I'm back in Ipoh again, blogging as the rest are off to Langkawi for an unofficial final class trip. I really do want to be there. At least I could buy some Reese's Peanut Butter. But my mom is going to Korea and my dad would really appreciate me fetching my brothers to and from school everyday. Well, he did get me a 37k car. And he did raise me. So.. yeah. I'm not really complaining about being here. I even had a reunion dinner with some relatives from Singapore. Here's one of em.

My 3rd Gu Po.
She said I looked ugly with this hair.
And yes, ugly, was the word.

Alright. That probably sums up most of the things I did. I'll be sticking around in Ipoh (which would mean I'm missing the Langkawi Trip, Sandra's birthday party, Tsu Yi's birthday party, the Genting trip, the Sunway Lagoon trip and Daniel's birthday party, FUCK!) and I'm only going back on the coming Wednesday so that I can go for a dinner and a movie with a friend I haven't gone out in a long time; Jason. Hopefully Marianne and Wykit can join us. Going for breakfast with Bern on Thursday. Packing, again, after the meetup so I can be ready to move out all the way to KL. Going to LimKokWing on Friday with a friend from Ipoh to help her check out the college. Meeting Jon on Saturday and getting ready for my first job as a media person on Sunday. Okay, yeah, basically I don't have plans on Sunday so..Let's go out!

I hope work would completely occupy my mind. The truth is, I am starting to get disgusted by my increasingly nostalgic preoccupation with the past. It is a weakness I can scarcely afford if I really intend to go on. (And yes, you, I edited this part. Geez.)

Well, at least shopping helped a bit. I spent RM288 today on a pair of Clarks. They feel just as good as they look. And I'm gonna be wearing them to work! Yeeeehar!

Oh, check THIS out :D

It's just full of tired excuses,
Kevin C.

You Want A Quickie?

2008-03-09T21:04:00.004+08:00

For some reasons, Blogger is not letting me

upload any pictures. And I'm not in much of a mood

to be typing another load of crap.

So why don't you click on these:

Arthur's Blog

Eman's Blog

My Facebook Album

Exams and assignments are all going on in this coming week so I'm pretty banged up. Fortunately, I've confirmed that I will be working under the production of Venus at NTV7 starting the 24th of March until late May. In other news, I'm getting a car from my parents. Not the Beemer but definitely better than nothing.

I just decided this morning that I will not be going to Langkawi at the end of the coming week because I'll have to get back to Ipoh to run a LOT of errands to make sure the car comes my way. Coming back next Tuesday so I can fully utilize my last two weeks at Fitness First. And then meet up with some friends for a few meals and voila! I'll be working!

By the way, I deleted the post about Will because I don't want to cause him any trouble. "Police are banning all sorts of celebrations of victory". Hah. Politics are so funny when you're apathetic.

Oh, check this out.

It could get physical,

Kev C.

Blogger Under Construction

2008-03-05T19:36:00.000+08:00

It's gonna be a while.
There's a LOT of cleaning to do.

Piece by piece,
Kev C.

Because I Know

2008-02-29T02:58:00.001+08:00

I had a walk with a friend today.
And then I ate the thing I always eat.
And then I worked a little harder.
And I said hi to a stranger next to me in the train.

I even cleaned my room a little.

And I found the pen I thought had lost.

I talked a friend out of her worries.

And happiness followed me everywhere.

Happiness that cannot be referred to any definite object,

But dwelt entirely within myself,

And which never left me a single instant.

And I realized, that the tail was with me all along.

I'm leaving for Subang for another three days. I'm quite happy about it, really. I get to swim! And I get to sleep on an enormous bed and shower in warm water and get all crazy with my friends. Exams are coming in two weeks and Naomi's wedding is in a week's time and I still haven't bought my baju melayu. I'm so so so excited!

I don't know about you, but I'm sure if you look away for a while. You will have tons of exciting stories to tell me too. And I want you to know that no matter what happens, in the end it's always up to you to make things better or worse, for yourself or for the bigger picture. And if you wanna cry, go on. But if you wanna smile, I'll share every bit of your joy. Because I know that happiness is so much better than sorrow, and if there's anything I want right now, is for you to be happy.

A love that will never grow old,

Kevin C.

ps: I've been bloggin way too much. Gotta start focusing more on the exams coming and also work related stuff. Might be gone long. Miss me a little. Or else!

The Palest Green I've Ever Seen

2008-02-24T10:07:00.002+08:00

Kevin, the king of wishful thinking.

Everyone stared at him in awe as the old man started mumbling in a gibberish language. I was wondering how long it would take for him to get one duck ready and how long it would take for me to get mine. It was past 9pm, and I was hungry.

The hasty ringing of my phone indicated no mercy and patience as it went off. Jumping off rather quickly and leaving the duck and the old man behind, I picked up the white little phone just to see that the caller was unidentified. I did not stop to think of the possibility of who it could have been, even though for a split second my brain came up with the image of Mel picking up the phone and answering a call from The Body Shop before she completely woke up.

"Hello." I was polite. And I was more than half-awake.
"..."
"Hello there. This is Kevin." If it had been a call from my future employer, they would have thought I was an early riser and an overly optimistic person from how I sounded.

"Eh babi, salah nombor la." And the phone went dead.

Fuck you. Fuck your mother's cunt.

It was flattering, really, when the men started making faces at me. When one of them started following me around like a puppy and when two bravely bought me drinks. My thoughts drifted away to the other night at Maison, constantly. But I kept restraining myself. Don't you go there, Kevin. Not tonight.

No, this Friday night was going to be fun. I silently told myself as I realized that I was not wearing my glasses nor contacts, which rendered me useless when it comes to spotting the beautiful.

"Are you lost?"
"It's not a big place. So, no, I'm not lost."
"You look confused."
"Well, I probably am."
"What is bothering you?"
Who IS this guy?
"Are you confused about your your sexual interest?"

I could feel his palm sliding up my jumper, his thumb rubbed me at all the right places. Just that it felt really, really wrong.

"No, I'm not. Excuse me."

I sat there alone at the corner, playing with my phone and talking to my friends. They seemed eager to get laid. Well, two of them anyway. Jamie was not that happy. Maybe because his ex-BFF was making out with this ugly looking 28 year old who looked more like he was ten years older than he claimed to be.

I smiled at some guy and looked away. Jamie gave me a face and asked why I was being so anti-social. I was not. I smiled at the guy, and that was a lot to ask for from someone in my mood. And he's not that cute.

"Oh, this is my friend Kevin." Jon was somewhat excited. He could be high for all I knew. He never stopped drinking since we came in and we had already been there for more than an hour. He gave me this huge grin while he introduced Chad to me. The hot, tall, muscular and confident model who knew almost every single one person that night.

"Hi there, um, Kelvin?" Gawd I hate that.
"Nope, it's Kevin."
"I've never seen you before."
"He's a virgin to Frangi." Jon exclaimed. Was it really an exciting thing to say?
"Oh, really, we should kiss him."

Oh dear Lord, no.

"No, it's okay. I'm not a big fan of kissing." Not with strangers anyway.
"Why not?" He had beautiful eyes. Well, Panasonic model what.
"I went to the club a few months back and hit on this guy but ended up getting kissed by all his friends and one of them just frenched me and I thought it was quite a rude thing to do."
"He frenched you?"
"Yeah, he's probably crazy."
"No, it's because you're cute." Shit. He's one hot motherfucker.

I smiled distantly. He offered me his drink. I knew I was being ridiculous when I refused to use his straw. Rum coke. It was not so bad. Actually the drinks I had were not bad at all. I went in and got myself a Heineken, which got my face red right after the first glass. The Jon offered me his Mohito. And then Chad offered me his rum coke. And then there was this dude who bought me another Heineken. And then Leon (who is probably the only guy I like) bought me a gin tonic. My face was crimson and I laughed along wildly with people that planted kisses on my face. People I knew nothing about. People I wanted to have nothing to do with. Everyone wanted to talk to Chad. Everyone wanted to kiss him. Everyone stared at me when I backed off while he offered to kiss.

Where's CJ? Would he be here?

My eyes could not travel far. I didn't even recognize Will.
"Hey Kev!"
"Hi Will, how are you?"
"Great, you're here alone?"
"Nope, friends. You?"
"Same here. You look a bit drunk."
"No, I'm pretty sure I'm not. It's just the face."

I asked him if he was attending the wedding. He said he was and that he had talked to Naomi about hosting the wedding with me and some other college mates that he thought had potential. I asked him if RedFM was hiring and he said definitely. Then I, successfully, asked him out for lunch.

Oh, Chef Wan was there as well. We were like old friends even though I knew nothing about him other than his famed gay cooking techniques. It was hilarious when his friends tried to kiss me thinking that I was one of them.

"You look familiar, have I seen you on TV?"
"I'm pretty sure you haven't."
"Do you wanna dance?"
"Maybe next time, I've gotta go. Friends."

I waved bye to Will and the chef and also this beefy dude I once saw on TV. The night was long. But I had my share of fun watching people. It was interesting, really. I kept asking myself why was I not letting myself be one of them. Carefree. Fuck-free. Jon was having a blast mindlessly kissing men across the room. He had had three ejaculations at the end of the night and one of those were contributed by his erotic escapade in the restroom with three other men, which I found pretty bizarre. But what awed me was when he started looking tipsy and started touching me in places and asking if I was having a hardon.

"No, why should I?"
"Cos I'm touching you."
"Oh, well. Then you'd know I'm not interested by now."

He laughed. Jon was one cocky guy. Cute, but not irresistible.

"I am desperate." Paul suddenly said.
"Why?"
"I wanna get laid so bad and I wanna make out with someone."
"I can ask someone to come over." Yeah, I could.
"No, leave those to yourselves."
"I'm really not into making out with strangers." Maybe I should have been.
"Awww fuck.. I'm so sad."
"Well Paul, if you keep telling yourself that you're sad and desperate then you'll just come across as an easy target. And you'll look pathetic. So stop putting yourself down. No one comes to a bar looking for a boyfriend. Don't expect nice conversations. Just fuck them."
"Ugh, that coming from you?"
"Well, I'm in love." I was?
"You are?" Am I?
"Never mind. Just go mingle, you'll get your man."

Because men are pigs and they are just for fucks.

It was agonizing to wake up the next day after all that drinking. I nearly fell onto the floor when I woke up on Saturday. But it didn't stop me from hitting the book fair. I'd have bought so many books if I had the money. But I've seven books at hand right now and I've not finished them.

Jasmine was bored. I was not up to another night at LaQueen.

I went down to KLCC for the first time since someone told me that going there was a dramatic move. I didn't know why I was carrying the big Deloitte bag. The only thing I had in there was a a book and my player. I sat at where people smoked in front of Maxis Tower for quite a while until the smoke got to me. I cleared my thoughts and texted Jasmine that I was there.

We went for a walk at the park after half an hour of talking about our individual Friday nights. Hers included someone calling her at 3 in the morning and mine included someone asking ridiculous questions.

Jasmine and I wandered through the place CJ and I used to walk around. I didn't let the memories take me in. I was out because I want to be with my friends so I didn't have to be bothered by my emotions. I know suppressing them is not the best way, but if I don't, I seriously have no idea what I'd do. I guess after a long while of ignoring your emotions, even the deepest sorrow will falter and my penetrating despair would eventually lose its edge.

Then Jasmine went for a trim.

And guess what, I joined her. Hah!
It wasn't half as bad as I thought it would be.
It turned out to be, well, neat. And thank God it's
not really noticeable. Hmm. Good one Kevin.

Eman joined us at 8 for dinner and we went to watch Step Up 2. I didn't see the first one but the sequel was pretty much enjoyable. Mindless fun. You don't get too involved with the characters, you just watch them dance and (sometimes) make fools out of themselves.

Eman parked his car near Avenue K. I mentally pushed away more flashbacks. We took some crazy pictures near the escalator and then drove to a small hilltop-like mamak near Jasmine's place. Eman and I talked a lot in his car on the way back. He is a strong guy. And he knew what was right and what was wrong. But at the end the emotions still take up a big part in your mind and you think of maybes and what-ifs. You start being analytical. You start to read between the lines and have thoughts that you know is irrational.

Oh, we're both Leos. What the heck.

It's 1203h now, Sunday. My cousins would be here in 30 minutes and we will be spending the entire day at god-knows-where. I didn't bother to ask. I just didn't want to be alone and let my mind wander. I just want to be out there so that I can perhaps be a little further away from myself. Because inside I keep struggling, and I'm already dying.

Ugh, my dying inner self shines in this picture lol.

Are you happy now?
Kevin C.

I'm Cool As Fire, Baby

2008-02-22T00:47:00.000+08:00

Wow. Long day. I don't even have to go deep into it.

First of all, Happy Birthday to my friend Raymond, better known as Kerberos among the inhabitants of cyberspace. Sam called me last minute last minute last night and drove Adele and I both to Asia Cafe to have a good ol yumcha session. Didn't have a cake but it was fun nonetheless, talking about our internships. Got home at sometime after 1am and watched another few more episodes of ANTM before heading to sleep, at 0430h.

(I really am enjoying the 9th season, it's the third season I've watched so far but it has a lot of public service announcements in it which I really liked, especially the anti-smoking ones)

Woke up at 10 and watched another episode until Eman came and brought Jasmine and I to Mel's apartment in Subang to do work for our filming. We might be staying there this weekend to shoot the film and ugh, well, swim. Yay. Here are some camwhorey pictures.

Jasmine and I attempting the hairflip.
Happiness is a hairflip away, but only for people with hair.

After a few good hours of easy work, I took a train downtown
and met up with Noel and his friend for dinner.
Well, erm, I destroyed his lighter so
he couldn't smoke so much.

It's 0100 now, again. I have yet to complete my film reviews and I'll probably wake up early tomorrow to finish it as class is only at 1400h. After that I'll be having discussions about our weekend bunk at Subang for the film work and I'll be going to have some fun with Paul, Jamie and some friends of theirs in KL at night. I like getting worked up, it gets my mind off things I probably should not even bother about at the time being. Blah.

Oh, a thank you to those who left comments on the previous post, whoever you are. I'm feeling a lot different about things tonight after talking to Noel. I don't know, maybe things would not be so complicated after all. All I need to do is to back out of it, and it's out of my mind, for good. Then I wouldn't even have to do the hairflip y'all.

And hot as ice,
Kevin C.

What Would You Do?

2008-02-20T01:05:00.001+08:00

I was bored in the studio when Shaz was recording.
"You looked awesome with longer hair!"

The me I always dared myself to be.
"There's a distinctive lack of gayness." -Ken Sebastian.

Rockin' the Mohawk with Jasmine.
"Holy Schmoly, Kevin! It's SO short!"

I look weird smiling like this.
But it's better than the alternatives. No?

"Whatever the mind of man can conceive, it can achieve."

-W. Clement Stone

I'm not a master at anything. If the truth is out there, I have yet to discover much of it. I know so little, but I know so much already. It awes me, the capacity of the human brain. You create your own universe as you move along, experiencing the high and low notes of life.

I wonder if life would be easier without love?

This post is not here because of me and my personal problems. The reason I'm blogging is just to calm myself from the velocity of things around me lately. The changes I'm going through as well as the changes happening to the people I care about.

So this is for you. The ones going through changes, the one watching us change. There are changes where you can so clearly see and then there are the ones you don't. But I believe all of us are changing at this point being. And I hope we change for the better.

(Taken from my other blog. A post from two years ago.)

Life is a journey.
One that is much better traveled with a companion by our side.
Still, despite our best intentions, some of us will lose our companions along the way. And then the journey becomes unbearable.
You see, human beings are designed for many things.
But loneliness isn't one of them.

Nothing is forever and the time comes when we all must say goodbye to the world we knew.
Goodbye to everything we had taken for granted.
Goodbye to those we thought would never abandon us.

And when these changes finally do occur,
When the familiar has departed
And the unfamiliar has taken its place
All any of us can really do is to say 'hello, and welcome'.

And here's my usual load of crap.

I’ve always known Alvin as an enthusiastic person. Energetic and charming at the same time, confidence and adrenaline oozes from the way he speaks and moves. He would have been the oldest man I had wanted to be too close with, being a 35 year old, if my memory serves. He has a weird habit of smelling my hair, too bad now that it’s gone.

The tall gym trainer was anything but welcomed tonight as he rubbed his sweaty palms on my shoulder, half-heartedly complimenting my new hairstyle. I told him it was done out of pure boredom plus a little bit of split ends. He chuckled, most likely knowing that I was not even remotely interested in being social. I walked out of the gym without saying goodbye, after reluctantly fishing out RM135 for yet another month of membership that I could potentially be wasting.

The few days went by at a pace faster than I could follow. Assignments were rushed and deadlines have been met one by one, forcing each of us to be more committed to our work every time we complete a task. I finally finished typing out my resume and sent it to a person at 8TV. Even though I still have a certain degree of hope that I would end up in Shanghai with Kah Meng.

“Of course we’d let you work in Shanghai, you should leave the country too! Look for new things! Just tell us how much we need to give you for your accommodation,” said my father, before finding out the shocking amount of money it would require for me to get a place there myself, even if it’s shared with KM.

I’ve finally moved out of the craphole I’ve stuffed my life in for the past two years and resorted to staying in a slightly bigger but hotter room with Andre. Speaking of Andre, I went to watch a movie with her yesterday. Dan In Real Life was a gem in the sack. As commercialized as it is, the film is full of real emotions along the above average acting of Steve Corell. The movie was heartfelt and heartwarming. It was a tearjerker to me, for reasons not to be spoken of. I would pay another RM8 to watch the movie again, it was that good for a low budget comedy.

Sincere gratitude goes to Moon and Kurt, who came all the way from Subang last night after I decided not to call CJ to come help me move some drawers and the table. The things would not have fit in his car. He would not have been free to come. I didn’t dwell too much thinking of the possibly of seeing him, calling each and everyone I knew who had a car that I’d be able to throw ALL my stuff in.

It took us more than two hours to completely move the things. Clothes were the easy part. Miscellaneous things were slightly more complicated as a person like me is full of them. Tables and drawers were disastrous during the carriage. But after the involvement of a lot of dust, cleaning, twisted wrists and ankles, we managed to finish everything by midnight.

I have yet to unpack. Still trying to finish off the last two chapter of Foreign Babes while paying as little attention as possible to the songs played repeatedly in my phone. The book fair in Atria is amazing, I feel like spending all my money there. There are more than 10 books I wanted to buy but I ended up getting only one, RM20 cheaper than the original price.

Maybe it was, after all, nothing,
Kevin C.

The Night That Deserved Celebration

2008-02-15T01:46:00.001+08:00

I think they're mom's friends, gambling.

Inside the house, everyone was socializing.

No, socializing happened outside the house as well.

Mickey (apparently that's the correct spelling) and me.

Okay, I don't know what her english name is.
But she's always been the pretty one in the family.

Sen Yee and her siblings wore identical shirts.

We spent our childhood playing with each other
at my gram's place. And I just found out that her
name was Nicole. I mean, come on.

Mom's friend. Her husband was awfully good-looking.
And they kissed under the fireworks. How romantic =)

Outside.

Mom and Dad before praying.

We had amazing fireworks but I couldn't take nice pictures of them so you guys will just have to miss it and find something else better to look at in the meantime, since I'm probably stopping some activities here. I'll try to locate some fun and interesting blogs and provide their URL on my links column just in case you're bored of reviewing the older, lighter posts.

I'm gonna head to the showers and hit the sheets soon. My bus is at 7:45am tomorrow and I didn't sleep much last night. I wouldn't be going back tomorrow if it wasn't for that play we are told to do on Monday. *Yawns* I'm sleeeepppy. Gnite y'all.

Always with gladness,
Kevin C.

This Is Fact, Not Fiction

2008-02-11T22:18:00.001+08:00

"Kevin, what do you want to become when you graduate?" asked my uncle, whose strands of white hair indicated that he could be way older than my aunt, the lady sitting beside him.

I shifted my gaze from my uncle to the sapphire stones dangling right above my aunt's ample chest, wondering why they had been so captivating. The gemstones were humongous, and they must have worthed thousands, resting against her cleavage.

"What do you like to do?" Pursued my other uncle, who smoked before entering the restaurant. He looked older than his siblings, who I was related to by blood. He smokes. I told myself, making an additional mental note not to smoke however much pressure I'm given.

I want to be famous. I thought silently.

I woke up today (11th February) at 8:07am before the alarm went off. I tried to grasp the remnants of my dreams, breathing slowly yet telling myself not to drift back into another slumber, which would possibly result with me failing to be punctual for class. I had a dream of myself being a news reporter, interviewing pretty girls at an aircraft exhibition held at somewhere that looked like a cabin for planes. I even got into a helicopter.

College was nothing out of the ordinary today. My film group was given back the assessment for our midterm assignment and we scored a proud 28/30. Of course, we weren't satisfied. I wasn't sure if it was a good thing to pursue every last bit of perfection, but it has gotten me this far. After settling down, we were given a film to watch and we were told to act out a short play based on what we had seen in the film. I didn't enjoy the movie, romance was an issue. I'm in no position to talk about romance. I still don't cry watching romantic movies with dreadfully pulling dialogues, I wonder if I am immune to them.

Had lunch with friends and paid half of my attention to the conversation among the Finnish students and that one Malaysian dude with long hair. He put on an unimpressive accent that reminded me of Bacon. Or Baron. I laughed inward, realizing that the slightest grin on my face would alert the Sunsilk user that I was overhearing quite a few of his boring remarks regarding the Asian culture.

Do I sound like that when I talk? Do I annoy people around me because I'm loud and that I have an accent that comes unnaturally?

I walked home with a melancholy of winds in my heart. Knowing that I would not be able to make it back to Ipoh on Valentine's. I do have valid reasons not to go back for the annual home party, an occasion that I have never ever missed in my 21 years of life. I had a news report due on Wednesday that I had yet to start. I needed to know what to do for the class play and I am moving out of this house at last to stay with another friend. You don't even want to take the bus back. No, I didn't. But I don't want to be in KL on Valentine's Day either.

A friend was asking me to meet up with him on MSN. He said he would really like to hang out. I was attracted to him once, in a weird way.

"Of course!"
"But my boyfriend will be here as well."
"Oh, so?"
"But he's leaving 2 days before me in case you want to go somewhere."
"We'll just make plans when you're here then."
"Sure baby."

Don't call me baby.

Adele called soon after I decided not to reply this somewhat horny acquaintance. She needed a favor, one that I was happy to oblige even though I was feeling drowsy after all that thinking. I was somewhere else during the class movie.

I reached home exhausted, but had a phonecall from my aunt telling me that she was on her way. Fuck it. "Okay then, I'll be ready when you're here!" I hated being cheerful when I'm not feeling all that jolly. But there are a lot of times where you need to be so vain in order to maintain a certain social decency. My future job would require a lot of maintenance in social decency, I wonder how I will turn out to be.

I nodded blindly as my aunt was telling me how bad the traffic would have been if we had departed later than our time. She was telling me about her sister's husband. The man with the head of white hair that I would eventually meet was actually one of the senior manager of IGM.

"What's IGM?"
"Aiyo, you don't know IGM ar? People hear got IGM house tong tong go and buy lo!" Aunt May said excitedly. I wasn't sure if her enthusiasm was sincere as her husband was an architect as well. And tong tong means everyone. All. Something like that.
"Oh, so he makes a lot of money huh?"
"Later you see la!"

I reached the neighborhood of the rich and famous in Klang. Huge houses that would require at least 5 maids to be properly taken care of. I had not know that my relatives were well off at all. I knew some of them were. I just didn't know that my ayi (aunt) had marry a rich man. I had not seen them in 15 years. The only thing I remembered was that I used to stand on the table as they cheered for me to sing.

"Hi Kevin! Welcome!" My aunt came to me with a firm handshake.
"Hi ayi. Happy New Year." Standard, I know.
"You look just like your father?!"
"Oh really?" Chinese are used to asking rhetorical question. I did not expect her to say 'really' or point of the parts of me that resembled my dad.
"You should sing for us!" Why are they so excited? New Year?
"I don't think I can la. Sore throat." It was true. It's back.

I greeted uncles I had not meet before and also aunts who smiled at me without possibly knowing what I was doing in the house. Aunt May was less than considerate when she asked me to address them one by one. I did the greeting with hesitation, stopping ever so slightly when I see changes in their faces that indicated that I was rude enough to forget who they were even though they remembered me.

I stared blankly into the screen of the plasma TV as the chatter began. Damn, they are rich. I remembered a story of a boy seeing a red sports car flew by on the streets.

"Dad, look at them."
"What is it?"
"They must be rich, but they mustn't be happy."
"The person who says that, mustn't have much in his pocket."

The IGM uncle brought out Haegan Daz ice-cream for the kids and served me with Vodka Orange in a crystal glass. I was not in a position to judge but the conversation was getting interesting to not pay attention to.

"Girl ar, don't spin that chair la, later spoil."
"I think we need new chairs."
"Just throw this away la, I think I bought it for only RM1000."
"Hey sis, you should buy an Osim. The cheapest one is only RM9000."
"No, I sat on the world's most comfortable chair once. It's RM20000, I'd rather have that."

There was a wave of laughter. I wasn't sure if they were happy or being sarcastic.

"Wa, so long never come to your house, got so many statues already hor?"
"Yeah, his sir name is Ma, that's why he has miniature horses all over the house."
"How about this ox?"
"Oh, that was given by a friend. You want you can take it."
"No la, putting an ox in the house would mean that you will work like an ox. That's bad feng shui. And there's already a lot of things in my house. I would not have a place to put this thing."
"Look at this, my friend gave it to me as well."
"Does it come from an elephant?"
"No, that would be illegal. It's the horn of a rhino."
"How much did you get it for?"
"It's a gift, but I guess you can get it for a few thousand bucks la."

I quietly enjoyed my Ferrero chocolates as I watch them, amused. And then we went for dinner after the youngest sister and her husband arrived half an hour late.

"I want to be a TV broadcaster." I do.

"Oh, you still studying now right? Got work part time?"
"He emcees events for big companies you know!" said Aunt May.
"Wa, next time can see you on TV."
"You should ask him to host the annual dinner too."
"Do you think you can do it Kevin?"
"I always do my best when it comes to hosting events."
"I like your spirit."

The dishes came out on after another. Seafood after seafood. The place was renowned for its infamous curry noodles. I almost died eating it. But I had two bowls because it was simply too good to have just one. Then came fried taufu. A fish. Prawns. Abolone. Mushrooms with broccoli. Eggs with oyster. Vegetable. Another fish. Friend chicken. Crab. I've never had a normal dinner with more than six dishes before. I was almost full at the forth.

"Kevin, eat this." Said the youngest aunt who sported a short hairdo as she placed a slab of fish on my plate. It was a part of a Stingray. I threw up the last time I ate it.
"Hmm, delicious." I chewed on it vigorously, trying to drown out the taste and the smooth texture rolling on my tongue.
"Have you had any of this?" She placed eggs and oyester on my plate.

I've always find it awkward to have things put in my plate without the prior acknowledgment of whether I liked the food or not. So I made a metal note of not puking and braced myself as I put the oyster in my mouth. Shivering ever so slightly as the taste stimulated my taste buds. I downed the remaining between my teeth with more Vodka Apple, it didn't taste like apple at all. If anything it was peachy. And I've never been a fan of peaches.

I had three bottles of Vodka fruit, thinking that 5% per bottle would do no harm to my body, and had more oyster, prawns, crab as my plate was reluctantly filled with them. At the end of the dinner when they asked me why I stopped eating crabs, I revealed to them a patch of rashes on my arms. And I told myself to resist yet another urge to drink more. Even though my face was turning a bit red.

"Kevin, can you drink?"
"He should be able to drink! He'll be an emcee! He needs to love booze."
"I have a little bit of allergy."

The youngest aunt beside me moved herself an inch away, scared that the rash would be hazardously contagious. I pretended not to notice. I would have been freaked out if someone beside me broke out with an arm of redness. I excused myself and went to the washroom. It didn't help. So I sat back down and remained quiet as I watched the sons and daughters of my grandmother's sister talked about their endeavors.

I didn't sing in front of everyone that night. But I did in the car on the way back to the song the radio was playing. I sang it in the karaoke the last time I went. Bern sang it too.

Once upon a time I was falling in love
Now I'm only falling apart
Nothing I can do, it's a total eclipse of the heart

I should have given you a reason to stay,
Kevin C.

Gimme an M, Gimme an I, Gimme a C...

2008-02-09T18:07:00.001+08:00

Happy Chinese New Year!!

For those who didn't really know, it's the year of the Rat and posters and stickers of Mickey Mouse (and sometimes Minnie) have been popping out on walls of Chinese homes. Well, most of them. I know of a few folks who don't celebrate the occasion. I'm not gonna describe much, the pictures should do the talking. But there are really so many of them that I've trouble deciding which to upload.

Sunny, Esmond and Kevin at the family reunion dinner.

Sunny eating the CNY bug.
I'm not sure what people call it but it doesn't
exactly exist in KL and it only comes out during CNY.
And it's effing loud and disgusting.

Kar Wai, Moon, Kevin and Sunny before going to the
very boring Pasar Malam with very bland drinks.

I didn't even zoom. It was in the neighborhood itself.
This made the night much more CNY-ish.

Mom wasn't exactly too thrilled to be giving away
her precious money, I guess. Hah.

Moon, Fatt Chai and grams.
He really couldn't be bothered less. Lol.

You can just tell how tired we were
by looking at our faces.

Dad has this really bad habit of choosing
the worst time to camwhore.

Miki and Kevin. She changes her English
name every two years. Lucky her she has very loyal men.

Eva and Kevin. I didn't know my relatives
had such names until I bluetooth-ed them pictures
and their names were displayed on my search results.

I met up with more high school friends that night.
It's weird that we never meet each other on any other
days even though we're all in KL.

Oh, and it was also Chance's birthday.

Happy Birthday man.
I bet you were feeling happy we remembered.

My 3rd aunt and my youngest uncle.
He's probably 40 by now but you know what happens
when you have a little too much to drink.

I mean, look at Dad.
We're such a flexible family, in weird terms.

I love this one. The others have left to gamble
but we stayed back to have more fun.
Gimme gimme more, gimme more...

This is probably our only family picture taken
on CNY. But it's quite nice. Very nice =)

Kisses to the soon-to-be birthday boy!

I looked SO thin that night.
I'm so glad I bought that shirt from Brands Outlet.

The young and restless Chong's.
The youngest two are actually nine already.
I always thought they were, um, three.

And I met up with primary school friends
today (Saturday) morning. They couldn't recognize
me at first, which was pretty amusing.

And oh, I came out to everyone.
You should see me teacher's reaction :|

It's quite awkward for the ones in the closet.
But they remained straight for the rest of the day.

Overall, I've had an enjoyable Chinese New Year. Watched some hilarious Chinese flicks and did a little bit of family karaoke and took loads of pictures. I'm leaving tomorrow (Sunday) afternoon following a distant aunt's car instead of taking the ride I was offered to by Moon's ex because I don't wish to wake up at 5am on Monday. I'm actually having steamboat dinner in a few moments with distant relatives and I'll have to drive back to Kampung, again, for Fatt Chai and Kar Wai's birthday party. I'm so effing tired.

Gimme something, Mickey.
Kevin C.

High School Reunion

2008-02-05T15:38:00.001+08:00

Before we start, there's something I have to show (off to) you.
For some reasons, the gravity last night was a little stronger
than usual and my dad decided that we should all
make our eggs stand on the ground, no puns intended.

It took me like, 10 minutes.
But it was worth it because, I got to make a wish!

Date: 5th Feb 2008
Time: 0900h - 1300h
Venue: Shen Jai High School, Ipoh
Transport: Sze How's Myvi

After all those (effing boring) performances,
I wanted to take a picture at the stage with my friends.
But the principal recognized me and wanted a picture.

This is she, my high school principal.
Regardless of what people say about her,
I think she's been doing a very noble job.

I was quite happy to see that there was
more than four from my 2005 batch to be there.

Even though a few of them looked
relatively reluctant. Maybe it's just the pictures.

Met up with a few friends who're about to graduate.
They're in Senior 3rd Year now. God.

I hardly feel that I'm old. Hardly.
But I did when I saw these folks today.

If a picture tells a thousand words, this one
should let you know how much fun the students
were having throughout the day.

Very much fun, indeed.

And these are the only four from S3A '05 who
cared enough to be there for all the right reasons.

I have green eyes in this one, yum =)

On our way out, we passed by our old classroom
back in 2002. I was 15 then. I'm 21 now. WTF?

And I still remember every single second of it.
Being in class all day was a heck of a bore.

So we made our way to the entrance/exit.
And apparently now they have this big ass logo thing.

Trust me, we still know how to have fun.

And also, trust me, they're not gay.

Even though Sze How (the one in green)
looked a tad too gentle in this one. Lol.

And my my, look what a car my friend got.

I mean, I knew he was rich because he drove a
Mitsubishi Airtrek to school last time. But this is too much!

Happiness is a reunion away,
Kevin C.

Some Random Things

2008-02-04T16:35:00.001+08:00

Paul, Jamie, CJ and Kevin at Jamie's birthday at Chilli's.

The little bloodsucker in my toilet.
Death served him right.

Mel using the whole Xiao-Mei nerdiness
to her full advantage. And she's getting good at it.

I looked a little like a zombie that morning.
I didn't eat properly for, like, days because of the sickness.

Thanks boss, for everything. Sorry for the mess.

I went to One Utama with Jamie the day after
and bought myself some stuff.

And a few days, later, I came back to Ipoh.

Meet my brother, Esmond.
Age: 13+
Height: 175cm

And meet my other brother, Sunny.
Age: 14+
Height: 181cm
(Yes, he's taller than me, eff it)

The three of us wish you a happy Chinese New Year.
I know, they're weird. Aren't we all?
And I gotta admit, this picture DOES look a bit wrong.

Kev C.

Bite Me, Not

2008-01-25T19:43:00.001+08:00

Ants are really smart insects. Even though that I have always believed that insects are generally smart and probably smarter than humans in some ways. They are such great hunters and there are just so much things that we can learn by studying them. They've been here since forever, even older than the human species, so what can we learn by studying them?

Which is why I want to study about ants rather than human beings for once. Human beings change. We are complicated mammals with emotions. And some problems surrounding human beings are too difficult for someone with a brain like mine to solve. So moving on, more on ants.

According to Wikipedia, ants are a diverse group of more than 12,000 species, with a higher diversity in the tropics. They are known for their highly organized colonies and nests, which sometimes consist of millions of individuals. Ants have colonized almost every landmass on Earth. When all their individual contributions are added up, they may constitute up to 15 to 25% of the total terrestrial animal biomass.

"Ants have often been used in fables and children's stories to represent industriousness and cooperative effort, as well as aggressiveness and vindictiveness. They are also mentioned in religious texts. In the Bible, ants are held up as a good example for humans for their hard work and cooperation. Aesop did the same in his fable "The Grasshopper and the Ants". In parts of Africa, ants are considered to be the messengers of the gods. Ant bites are often said to have curative properties. The sting of some species is claimed to give fever relief."

Wow. I mean, look at them, these annoying pests can actually cure the infections that has troubling human beings (esp ME) since forever. And the thing so special about them is that you hardly see them fight, they work together as a colony and they live simply just to live. I didn't look far enough to see how long ants can live but I bet it can be longer than human beings. They search for food, they build their own homes, they communicate, they are so focused and determined when they are on their duty that it impresses me how small my life can be compared to an ant.

I've read an article back when I was 12 that ants are very strong-willed creatures. The author said that he was bored and he poured water on his table just to see how the ant works its way out of the pool of deadly liqiuid fifty times its size. But for some reasons, the ant manages to get to the edge and struggles to crawl back out to the dry grounds, even though ants don't swim.

Lesson learned, thanks ants. Even though I've squashed more than 20 of you in the past 30 minutes because you keep biting me and stealing my Halls Mint. I guess what I need to learn from you is the sense of self-being. You do what you can do and you live your life just to serve your purpose as an ant because that is what you are and that is what you do best. You get out of messes even though some people just keep making it difficult for you. You work together with your family and friends to work things out and build a stronger future together everyday. And that's something very, very impressive to me.

Sometimes I like to get a little weird and study bugs and leaves around me. Maybe that's because I used to be a full time nerd who was overweight, unattractive and... nerdy. I used to catch insects and put them into a bottle so I can watch them, even though I'd get upset that they would always end up dead eventually. Oh gosh, these ants are really something. They keep crawling over your body until they find this tender spot on your skin just to sink their.. fangs into you.

Would anyone understand the love between ants? Do they have love at all? Is it because of their incapability to love that they become so hardworking? But isn't hardworking lifeless for you just go on with life everyday doing the same thing? Maybe we won't ever find out, because I don't think we care enough for the species. We certainly care about human beings more, countless books have been published about psychology and the learning of human. But do we understand ourselves any more than we understand the ants?

Because I KIll Everything That Does,
Kevin C.

The Epiphany

2008-01-24T14:46:00.002+08:00

I hosted a game last week, or somewhere way before that because it feels so long ago. I wasn't feeling that well the day actually but Shaz called and asked me to co-host this event with him. The motive of the event was to give help to people who are suffering due to AIDS and I was there to emcee this really fun gaming session for an hour or so. I was so nervous it felt like it was only 5 minutes on the stage. It was my first time working with Shaz and gawd did I embarrass him! The event was named Pack The Floor For 24. It is a dance marathon where the participants were to dance and go through aerobic classes non stop. I even joined the last class because it was about self defense and you know I'm all about giving punches to people. Heh. It was fun!

Thank you Shaz and Leonard to have given me such a great opportunity. And also the goodie bags. Wow. Lol.

And oh God, I found a dead centipede in my toilet. If it wasn't dead and if it had stung me when I was in for any business of interest I would have died and no one would have noticed until maybe a few days later, since everyone seems to be giving me time for myself to sort things out. Come on, friends, ask me out! The boy could use some good ol' night out you know.

Come on, come on, gimme a break.
Kev C.

Divya Prem's 21st Birthday!!

2008-01-19T16:24:00.001+08:00

I can't believe I've been blogging here for more than a year already. I can still remember taking pictures with friends at the cafeteria during Divya's birthday LAST year and we had a cake and we got most of the class to take a group picture for the gal and now she's 21! She's officially the adult in the group now, even though I'm most likely gonna be one after a while as well.

I know I haven't been blogging in a while and no, the blog is not under construction nor am I married. It's just that things have been pretty hectic lately. College has already started for more than two weeks now and we're finally settled with the fees and classes and we're already making plans for our final project, a 20 minute film! Isn't it exciting?

This is Jamie. One of the casts of our film.

And this was taken at MidValley before
we went into the movies.

Alright, I still don't think I've got too much to blog about and I'm not gonna copyright any of the pictures this time because I'm just too lazy to. So just look through the pictures and get a rough idea of what fun I've had since 2008 commenced weeks ago.

Divya's Birthday (18/1/2008)

The grownups.

The cake.

The traiditional face smudging.

The ones enjoying chicken wings.

The ones who sang.

The ones who sang some more.

The ones with presents.

The ones who haven't got wasted.

The one who has. And no, not the one on the left!

And the one who had a blast on the night of her birthday.

Happy Birthday Divya! We love you!!

Out They Come

2007-12-22T01:20:00.001+08:00

[Thanks you Sam!!]

My results are as follow:

Consumer Behavior : A
Advertising : A
Media, Culture and Society : A
Law : B+
Creative Strategy : B

All I can say is: YAY!!!

The 5th semester, in my opinion, was the toughest semester I've had so far in KDU and I'm sure it's the toughest of all the other semesters because I've only got one more to go and it's a 7-week semester so I'm not exactly too threatened. Other than Media, Culture and Society, all the other subjects had multiple presentations and assignments thrown in and it was actually quite taxing for those (including yours truly) who simply can't seem to work way in advance and try to get the most of it by doing last minute work with as much effort as they can master.

I actually worried a little for my Consumer Behavior or, maybe, Advertising (I keep getting them mixed up because both are taught by Ms Z) but they both turned out to be A's. I didn't think I would score too well for MCS because I only got 15/20 for my mid-term paper and I only studied for the exams two days before that (or less) and I got an A for that also. Praise the Lord I got 3A's this time. I don't exactly remember all my grades from the previous semester but I definitely remembered the C+ I got for Media Planning and how it shattered my heart. Okay, maybe that was too much. I wasn't too heartbroken. It had maths in it and I was expecting a bad C or D.

Anyway, back to assessing my grades. I got a B+ for Law!! I was about to scream when I saw that one (which was the first I paid attention to when Sam sent me my results). I admit, I wasn't the most hardworking. I wasn't the one who paid most attention and heck, I was hardly the brightest because I swear there were times I just felt like I was going to die especially during those class quizzes and everyone seemed to be handling it better than I did. And I even asked a real smart senior and he got a C+ for Law and now I got a B+! I know, it's just a B+ and some folks might have gotten an A or even a B+ like mine but WHO CARES ABOUT YOU WHEN IT COMES TO MY GRADES?

I feel like Chris Rocker. Or is it Chris Brocker? God, the guy's screwed up in the head a little. Or maybe he's just out of my league when it comes to the acceptance of the different species. OR he would actually turn out to be a nice guy and I'd like him if we were friends in real life. But hey, we're not. But seriously, what I wanted to say was.. I'm happy with my Law result.

I can never truly understand Ms Naomi's standards. But I guess I will never have to anymore because she (most) probably won't be seeing me for my last semester. I got a 13/20 for my PSA designing and also below average comments for my presentation. And then I thought I did okay for the exam. And the result turned out to be quite okay. Just that who wants to settle with an okay when you can definitely settle with something better?

But hey, 3A's and a B+ for Law? It's all good babe.

I'm still stuck in Ipoh until the end of the month and I'm starting to get a little sick of my precious hometown. Before I elaborate much on the sick of hometown part, here are some pictures of my friends who came by to spend some time with lonely little me. Behold.

(from left) Ally, Div, Jo, Del, Denise
after finishing their infamous Ipoh beansprout chicken.

Went to Cameron.
The red one looked absolutely inviting.
And so we went to have a strawberry steamboat.
And sweet corn. And pop-sickles. Yummeh!!

I had another fight (or quarrel) with my mom again this evening after she returned from her partying weekend in Thailand. She said she didn't want me to hang out with gay or lesbian people and she said that it's the family that bears the shame if people outside see the pictures of me and another person. And she claimed that she had given me proper education since young and there was nothing wrong with the family and I should be a normal kid and shouldn't even be close to wanting to be friends with all those "sick and disgusting gay people".

First of all, I'm not sick. I had a body check and I was clean. So to hell with that, literally. Second of all, apparently she STILL does check my messages and pictures from time to time without asking for my permission. Third of all, I don't SHOW those pictures to ANYONE except truly trusted friends and TRUST ME when I tell you that family friends are never ever going to be exposed to ANY of those pictures because they're simply PRIVATE. Not just the pictures we took in bed or anything but also the "normal" ones I took with friends. I don't SHOW my pictures to family members or my mother's friends and I certainly would NOT be uploading any pictures of my partner and me on my blog unless they seem utterly misleading (aka straight).

I'm sick and tired of my parents going through my phone. They would call the person I last called to make sure I wasn't talking to bad people and that freaked out a few people. She would go through each picture on my phone OR she'd sit beside me when I'm playing with my laptop DEMANDING me to show her each and every picture I have taken in recent times and I'm FUCKING serious when I told her that I did NOT enjoy her going through my personal stuff like that. For God's sakes I'm leaving them in a few months time and I'm SURE AS HELL won't be coming back once a week when I'm working and I'm sure I wouldn't be missing the fun at all. They'll still get a part of my salary until they don't need money anymore and I'll be going back for public holidays but seriously? I really just want to be left alone by my parents. They are not just protective, they are condescending and homophobic to the extent that they wouldn't watch Hairspray and hated John Travolta for playing a woman in Hairspray even though he was their favorite actor before they saw that movie.

I mean seriously, since young I've never received a letter that has never been opened before it was given to me. I've told them more than a few times that I have gay friends and the reply they had was "oh you shouldn't be friends with them or you'll get AIDS" or "we didn't send you to KL to become one of those freaks" and "we only let you study there because we want you to be exposed to the city and become a successful person and making friends with gay people is definitely unacceptable". Well guess what? I have met and befriended dozens of gay people and trust me, as bitchy and freaky they are some of them are really successful and respectable. And guess what? I've shook most of their hands and I still am not infected with AIDS or HIV and I am telling you that unless I really go screw around I will most likely NEVER get anything that sort. Secondly, they're not freaks. Full stop.

Kevin, we need you to make sure the family doesn't get looked down upon. What about what I need? Kevin, this is what best for everybody. What about what's best for me? Kevin, you have no idea how we would feel if people even suspect that you like men. What about how I feel?

Let me get this straight, I am NOT ashamed of being who (or what) I am because I don't think I have a problem and if you, whoever you are, has a problem with me I am really sorry for YOUR loss and I really think that you should really go worry about your own business because I don't think I have anything to be ashamed of. If I did, I wouldn't be in a relationship nor would I be even alive because I'm not the kind of person who can take negative criticism too well. I like the way I'm living now because I don't think there's anything, ANYTHING AT ALL, that is unhealthy about it. I'm doing better than average when it comes to college and I'm having a healthy relationship with the person who loves me just as much and probably more than I love him. And I think no matter what YOU think, I will STILL get my happy and successful future and I'm sure when the day comes you'll be very very sorry you have ever doubted my capabilities to make the right decisions and do the right things. I might not be as rich as some people but I sure as hell will be trying to be mentally fulfilled.

Always,
Kevin C.

Mid-December Update

2007-12-14T00:06:00.001+08:00

For those who thought I died a tragic death..

Or just thought Hiro WhatsHisName cut off my fingers..The b*tch is back, for now.

I need to start blogging because I want to and not for the others.
And yes, that's what I'm doing, mostly.
The past few weeks have been... romantic, very.
I know, I haven't blogged much. But there wasn't really time.
So here's some pictures to let you know what I've been up to.
If you don't bother, don't check back.
I'm not blogging as usual as I used to anyway, not anytime soon.
But still, have fun reading if you do, bother.
And hi there, I miss you. All of you.
If you think I don't miss you... you know who you are.

Some stuff from college:

I remember bloggin about this actually.
Aisha Sinclaire being in KDU for Canvas.

Arthur's 'surprise' party.

Doesn't Adele's sister look just like her brother's oldest sister?

Paul and Jamie, we had lunch in the *cough*goddamn*cough*
KDU cafeteria before sending him off to the airport.

Wow. You can clearly see their frustration.
And I can clearly spell them out.

Some social stuff:

Lunch and a movie at Pavilion with Ian, Jack and Shaz!
For some strange reasons I don't remember the name
of the shop. It's a Japanese restaurant in Pavilion.
Some shops after J. Co. Donuts. Check 'em out.

Less than twelve bucks for a bowl of rice
with fried fillets, 2 slices of fruits and unlimited
green tea refills. What's not to like?

Well, maybe me. Retarded me.

I also went to have Japanese food, AGAIN.
Seriously, I still don't totally dig them, but now I'm starting
to think that they're fine... Gawd.
That's Kenneth in the middle.

Lunch at Marmalade, Hartamas. By the way, it was also Mei Kim's birthday.

Some stuff from work:

I hosted the Presidential Dinner & Dance for
Fusion Excel International. Got better pay this time.
Which later contributed to the purchase of new clothes.
This is Lovey and me after the event.
I was almost going to die because I actually worked
at the KLCC Pikom PC Fair the day before the event...

And I had to get back to work in the day
AFTER the event, that ended after midnight.
You can definitely tell how happy I was
when it reached the end of the day.

Oh, by the way, Karen Kong was at the event I hosted.
Other then projecting an impressively loud voice from her petite
figure, the singer who found fame singing online and attracting
millions of fans Asia-wide could also conjure flame.

11th December 2007

That's all for this time folks.
Christmas greetings are raging lately and y'all know what it means..
It's time for SHOPPING!!

Who would have known,
Kev C.

Exam Week

2007-11-26T18:28:00.000+08:00

Creative Strategy was a good kick start.
But still, good luck to all of us.

Til next Monday,
Kev C.

Know Your Own Sh*t

2007-11-22T17:35:00.000+08:00

Or, rather, know your priorities.
That's what I'm failing to do at this point being.
I'm actually not sure where I'm going.
Exams are next week and I've hardly studied much.
The worst thing is I don't even think I care enough.
It's law, for lord's sake.

I've also begun to have self-doubt.
My performance ar recent presentations have been awfully bad.
It was almost as if I didn't want to be there.
She was right. They were all right.
They always are.
And I'm always wrong.
It's not even close to arguable.

I hated myself today.
Watching the words slip through your lips.
Feeling them slice through my shirt, aiming for my heart.
My ego was nothing more than dirt at that exact moment.
And so was I.

And so was I.

OH WELL, since things are over and done with,
I think I should just be thankful it didn't go too bad.
Even though according to them, it was bad enough.
I thought it was fine, or rather good.
But then again, I'm always wrong, right?

Things are starting to go out of hand.
I've never been much of a person who looks down at myself.
But today, I do.

It's like I have my energy and confident sucked out of me.
I feel useless and tired. And I'm getting scared.
But I know I still need to hold on.
I can't give up. Not after all this.
Hate me. Loathe me. I don't give a fuckin' shit.

Life's a beach. Sink, or swim.
Kev C.

Saving Grace

2007-11-11T00:20:00.001+08:00

Pictures from SJ 2007 Grad Night

Current mood: Uneasy

Guide me home,
Kev C.

Watch Your Fingers, Boy.

2007-11-09T00:14:00.001+08:00

Wow.
This is one fucked up day.
I was being molested in the taxi. By a male cab driver.
But I'll get to that later.

Alright. It's Thursday, I don't remember the last time blogging two days in a row considering how crazy this semester has been. But here I am again with loads and loads of not-so-juicy bits to share.

Let's talk about yesterday.
I was blogging in college. And then Jamie called.
After posting all the pictures, I bought him black pepper chicken.
He wouldn't let me out of his house cos he 'had no other plans' so I suggested that we went to watch Bee Movie, even though I knew I was going to have to watch it again with Jasmine.
Anyway, went to OneU, and he suddenly decided not to watch it.
Fine, went eating. Shopped for a while. Bought my first original DVD.
We went home separately, he had a date or some sort. At LaQueen. *Ugh*
When I got home, I waited for CJ to come online. And waited. And waited.
But that busy someone only came after 1 and it started raining and my internet connection started to piss me off by not letting me keep being signed in for more than 2 seconds.
So I gave up and slept.

Had the worst nightmare ever.
Cockroaches all over my bed. My arms. Under the blanket.
I woke up, thought it was real, and sprayed Ridsect everywhere.
And slept back at 5. Shit.

Woke up at noon. CJ was online! Hah. We talked until my lappie hung up.

Shaz called and asked me out for lunch and Havoc.
And I thought, oh God, he's addicted to that game.
So I went to Ikea with him and Jovinna.
Joey, Rebecca, Alim and William joined us.

I won the game. For the first time.I even broke the record, five time champion throughout 9 battles.

So anyway, Shaz decided to stay for coffee so Jo and I had to take different cabs home.
Here's the molesting part. If you think it's juicy or whatsoever.
I went into the cab holding my hair gel.
It was an Indian man so I said, "Happy Deepavali"
He said going to KDU would be RM10 for it was holiday.
So I agreed and got into the car.
He started touching.
And touching.
And touching.
And touching himself.
And me, again.
And offered me a blowjob.

It's actually nowhere this simple.
It was the scariest experience of my life.
I didn't even let him send me home.
Just stopped at Petronas and I went inside until he drove away.
Fuckin' hell. Son of a cow.
I'm trying not to swear but that man deserved to be shot dead.

You might get burned,
Kev C.

Wordless Post

2007-11-07T15:38:00.000+08:00

Hey there. How's November coming along? While I'm making a complete idiot out of myself sounding like an answering machine/operator/weatherman, you might as well enjoy what you're having because one more month and you'll be a year older. We all will.

Back to my mundane life as a college student (why the hell am I typing like this?) here are some pictures from recent happenings so.. knock your socks off.

I went to Sanctuary Bar for the first time with Jovie.
And apparently Mr Vimal aka Double D was the DJ that night.
And Dan, Shiv, Santa and Nuwan were there as well.

I had my first Tequila. I know. It's bad to drink.
Good news? I didn't like it a single bit.
Yeah, yeah. I'm a loser. I can't drink. Whatever makes you feel good.

The next day, I went down to KL cos my parents were in town
for a meeting at Renaissance Hotel. This is the view from
the hotel suite. I've never seen KLCC from this angle before.

Nice right?
The yellowish blur on the right building is my phone's refection.

The day after that (Monday), we decided to surprise
Adele with a mini party thingy after MCS class.

She was at the verge of tears when she saw us.
It was so sweet right?
So, yeah, here are more pictures from the occasion.
I'd post nicer ones once I get them from the dudes.

(1) Tsu trying to be funny.

(2) One of Divya's priceless facial expressions.

(3) Adele being forced to dig out the candles, as usual.

(4)

The day after that, my friends and I paid a visit
to the event our juniors held for their PR project.
It's titled 'Canvas' and its goal is to promote Malaysian Art.

The girl under the alphabet 'a' is Aisha Sinclare.
I got her number. Hahah! And I also interviewed the president
of Instant Cafe Theater for my friend's mag.

Later in the evening, Sam asked us out for a dinner at Williams.
The food there was expensive, as usual. Can you imagine spending
RM20 for a dish at a mamak stall with no air con?

Anyway, here are some pics to show you how 'fun' it was.

Yeah, Arthur WAS funny. Sam laughed real hard, again.

Yeap, so that was it for now. I'm going back to Ipoh on Friday after Law class to surprise my mother and I'm going to attend the Shen Jai 2007 Graduation Night. Haha. I was the host for my grad night. I wonder how they're gonna be this time around. Hopefully, you'll have an awesome Deepavali as well. May the colours of festivity light up our lives.

Hi there Ms Peggy =)
Kev C.

Starship Troupers.

2007-11-04T21:30:00.000+08:00

(Click to enlarge)
This picture is taken by my photographer friend.
I think it's very nicely put together, don't you think?

I'm not much of a newspaper person.
Not even the entertainment section.
But I was piqued by the hype about this angkasawan of ours.
The first Malaysian ever to have explored outer space.
Now that's something to be proud of.

Below is an article I came across reading about Dr. Sheikh Muszaphar Shukor. One which I thought was ridiculously hilarious.

======================================================= Malaysia's Beautiful Astronaut (Taken from http://ketiak-busuk.blogspot.com)
Eye candy for females or sexually-confused/gender-challenged males.

When I first heard that Malaysia was about to send someone up, I expected a lot of publicity for just another pariah Malay guy-next-door.

Well, I was wrong. Not about the publicity.

I saw the photograph of him and I was like “Wahlau, so lengchye. Maybe he’s not too bright up there.”

Then I read the article and apparently he’s an orthopaedic surgeon, and a part-time model.

Damnit.

Normal sexual orientation, with beauty AND brains.

Furthermore, he’s the country’s first astronaut.

Imagine the amount of chicks he could score. Chicks will be throwing themselves at him from all directions; like how people used to get stoned to death in the biblical eras. Only, instead of stones, they are CHICKS. Weehoo, weehoo.

I wonder if women will feign health conditions just to have him inspect their body parts.

Anyway, since I always say that God is fair, and since he’s apparently good-looking and evidently intelligent, I’m sticking with my theory that he has a minuscule penis.

However, I can't deny the possibility that he might have huge testicles, because it takes balls to actually be propelled up to space like that. Although, having a giant-sized scrotum doesn't help when you have a tiny pee pee. It'd only make the penis seem smaller. Tiny penises should come with raisin-sized testicles.

=======================================================

I also saw a few video clips of this astroman and apparently there has been a heaty discussion on local forums about his sexual orientation. Well, he looks perfectly normal to me, maybe a little too gentle when he speaks but it could just be those good mannerism you know? It COULD. Lol.

Anyways, congratulations Malaysia. You've got yourself a hero. This guy is an inspiration for all the younger generations who carry dreams that go beyond the borders of our planet.

We are all made of stars,
Kev C.

It's The Time Of The Month

2007-11-01T00:28:00.000+08:00

STOP TELLING THAT I'M FAT.
I KNOW I'M NOT. BUT IT STILL STINKS.

I know it's kinda ridiculous but yeah.
It's NOT the first time of the month.
I actually like the way I look right now.
It's less skinny, but my clothes fit just nice.
Ugh, motherf*cking bitches can't think straight.

Anyway, apparently some folks have been reading (you guys just can't drop a comment or two can you?) and they've been complaining about the lack of pictures. Hello? I'm busy, get it? Haha. But I'm flattered that you actually have the time to brush up on my private life, I'm not sure if self exhibiting is too good of a thing though. Anyway, here are some pictures for you to get off on. No, think straight.

This was from Joevie's birthday at Art's place.

I painted one of my fingers black. SO "emo" no?

And look what the lucky beyotch got from her mom?!

I NEED ONE TOO.
(This is one HUGE hint. My bday is 6th of August)

Remember I said I went to the pasar malam?

The good news? I didn't get a bad stomach the next day.

And FreshLook was giving out free contacts the other day.

Kit's gray eyes are just so.. captivating. Heh.

Anne and I got blue and green.
The blue was quite nice. I've always thought chinese folks
would look weird with blue eyes but it turned out nicely.
Mine wasn't that noticable, somehow =(

This was from last Thursday at One Utama.

And Mel put something on her hair.
Whatever that is, lol.

And I found this on the Law school's notice board.

That's more than a year ago. Gawd, time flies by.

So I went to Maison on Saturday night.
And got my shit scared out of me.

And if that wasn't bad enough...

They're the infamous KDU lecturers.
OMG to Ms Peggy. Bad witch? Heh.

And what goes on in the SASS office?Shall no longer stay in the office.

And when you think it can't get worse..

The students got crazy too.

It was absolutely 'compulsary' for them to dress up.
Well, it IS Halloween.
But some of them REALLY scared me.

Jordan looked like some comicbook villian.
Is that how you spell that word?

After a long day in college, I went down to Uptown and made Jamie buy me ice cream.Baskin Robins was full of people.
Jamie almost shouted a lady cos she was rude to me.
How funny. Rude asians.

Well, that's all folks, have a great Halloween.
And November is gonna be such an awesome month.
Yeah, exams and all. And MOM'S BIRTHDAY!

Get up and boogie,
Kev C.

Case Closed

2007-10-27T00:10:00.000+08:00

I've done my Media Law presentation!

My, was that a daunting task.

I only slept for two hours last night.

And I only started memorizing an hour before the real thing.

And we NAILED it!
Owh God, the best group of the day!

I was estatic when I heard the comments.

We were almost perfect. And the little imperfection, well, was too insignificant.

Yay!

I went to the Philips Contest yesterday.

Didn't win the cash but brought home and awesome blow dryer.

It actually makes your hair smoother. Lol.

And their 'talent' was actually for u to put back disseminated parts of shavers. And i had no idea how the mechanism worked so I got like the least points lol.

But it was fine. The folks from Philips were really nice.

Congrats to the winners anyway, that's a lotta money.

I decided to let go of Jamie.

He's just too 'good' to be true.

Despite all that has happened.

Yeah, I guess some things are just meant to be.

And I'm actually okay about it.

Cos I realised that I can't stand people with that kinda attitude.

I'll fish -slowly- some other time.

Life is just way too good sometimes.

At least, at the meantime, I'm free. Really, really free.

Young hearts should never be hung up by petty things.

Love really does love you,

Kev C.

Dilemma

2007-10-10T02:46:00.000+08:00

I chose to keep my Nokia N73.
I mean, I still get the 2GB card and the fantastic earphones.
But I just can't stand the plastic-ish feel to the whole phone.
The keypad looks and FEELS cheaper.
The back of the phone squeaks a little when you press on the camera cover.
The camera focus range is now 8-10cm, which is VERY unhelpful.
And the focus tone is somehow a tad gay.
And the phone has a new start-up tone that I can live without.
The only major difference is the new music interface with louder speakers.
My housemates would kill me if my speakers get any louder.
Okay, the silver one, it is.

Met Yoke Lin on my way to KL today.
She said I looked just the same, which was extremely surprising.
Most of my friends don't recognize me.
But then again, she reads my blog once in a while.

Fly me to the clouds? This was taken in the bus

on the way to Ipoh, hence the blurry edges.

And look what I found when I got back.
I was on the phone with Greg when it pecked the window furiously
and I just HAD to take pictures of this baby. Cute right?
It was hiding from the rain.

The Black Chinese Guy

2007-10-08T19:20:00.000+08:00

I am only human, living, dying

Just like any fool who ever breathes

If love is blind, if love's a drag

It always was, it always is

Maybe it's the sanest thing

Or just the sweetest kind of dream

But love was surely made for fools

Love was surely made for fools like me.

Alright. Pardon me for the disturbing title.
I need to get something off my chest.
And I'm gonna get it off nice and easy... I mean...
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?

I mean, seriously.

Like, totally. Lol.
Hello, I'm in a relationship too.
Doesn't make me a loser. Gawd.
I'm seriously doubting that you have any brains.
I mean, you're my classmate and all.
You lost the DVD collection I saved two months for.
And then you scolded me back when I asked you to find it.
"What's your problem man?! It's not like I wanna lose it! Yeah la I admit I lost it so what? What more do you want me to do?!"
I mean, seriously.

Then you insulted me when I STUDIED for my exam?
"Only chibais like you idiots would study. I get a C I'm f*ckin happy man!"
You're a loser.
I mean, seriously.

And then there's all the stupid stuff you did.

And there's last night.
BJM: Hey Kev. You know what I'm sorry but we can't fit you in the car tomorrow.
ME: Huh? Why not? I thought there was enough space for all of us.
BJM: Yeah, but (insert name here) wants to bring (insert name here) along for the trip.
ME: Is she in the group?
BJM: No la. Just that he wouldn't go to work without her. We need him to work.
ME: Oh, I'll talk to him then.

ME[sms]: (insert name here), do you really need (insert name here) to go to Ipoh with you tomorrow? Cos if you do, there'll be no space for me. [p/s: I was packed and all ready] Your teammates need you for the assignment. If you REALLY REALLY need her to go I'll have to find another way back asap. Please think about it.
INSERTNAMEHERE[sms]: Yeah, sorry dude.

Okay. First of all.
It's not like you have a brain.
It's not like you can work if you're going for assignments or not.
Second of all, if you're not going without her, it's obvs that you're not up for the work anyway.
You just wanna go for a road trip with your pretty girlfriend.
Third of all, if you're going WITH her, what the hell are you gonna 'work'?
You suck and I prayed that you died choking on pussy juice.
I mean, seriously.

If there's ONE person on earth, living without a brain.
It'd be you, motherfucker.

And thank gawd I managed to get a ticket back home.
The bus is at 1:30opm tmr. Awesome!

Updates:
1. I lost the receipt of my MP3 that was sent to repair. So now I can't get it back.
2. I lost the receipt of my ext. HD and now it's broken. So I can't get it fixed.
3. I found a shop call Winter Warmers at the Curve. Go there on weekends. There's live band singing oldies and it's outdoors. You feel like you're in Europe. I'll post pictures later.
4. The internet connection in my house is so screwed up it's cancelled.
5. I'm getting the 2GB N73 Music Edition.
6. I got a new Maxis number. It's 017-6766447.
7. I love Jasmine.
8. And Greg. I mean, seriously.
9. And Eman. And Sam. And KM. And Mel. And Shaz. And Div. And Adele. And Jo. And Arthur. And also some of the others I just can't remember atm. Oh, Andre!
10. I hate (insertnamehere). (insertprofanityhere) him.
11. I have season 5 of Charmed and also all eps of Drawn Together!!

Chill y'all! Or not.
Kev C.

Very.Important.Post.

2007-09-30T13:13:00.000+08:00

Hey folks,

I've changed my number to (+6) 016 523 9880.
The old number (+6) 012 507 9880 will not be used starting 01/10/07.

Apparently 016 has lower rates for international calls and texts.
Not that I actually need it anymore, but I'm gonna stick to it anyway.
So update your phones asap.

Outside of you
Kev C.

Smile, Like You Mean It

2007-09-29T04:28:00.000+08:00

You know when you're in love, you do all sorts of ridiculous things.
You have great doubts but greater beliefs.
You wanna believe that something is there.
Something you can't touch, smell, hear or see.
But you can feel it. Or so you keep telling yourself.

Until one day the feeling is taken away from you.
And you ask yourself what happened.
And you try not to think about it for a while.
And you keep yourself busy to not remember the feeling.
The warm feeling. The sweet feeling. The sickening sensation.
But you keep thinking. You keep reminiscing all the bits and pieces.
Until you finally convince yourself that something you held dear, has gone.
And it's too unlikely to come back.

You know when you're in love, you sing all the romantic long songs.
Those that swear by eternities or something as close.
Those you think you'd only sing to the one person you love most.
Even though you're not a particularly good singer.
Until one day the one person you love most is leaving you.
And you ask yourself what went wrong.
And you start listening to post-breakup song.
Ones that can be dreadful. And others that makes it so much better.

You know when you're in love, you're just like any other fool.
And love was surely made for fools like me.

Here's a healing song I played for a hundred times since last night:

Love Myself A Little Bit More -Zhao Wei
(Download or Listen to the song HERE)

When I kissed your face, I quietly sealed the love in that one moment
Time passed by so fast, and things could only be saved as memories
You're not inside my world, and there's nothing I can do to change it
As I stop missing you, I realize we could do so much better

How are the clouds supposed to move when the wind is gone?
Love had me over my head
Since we can't be together, I take your love as a souvenir
I still have a long way to go, and I'll take care of myself
Even if I think of you sometimes, everything is just past memory

I look at how lovers wish upon the shooting stars
I guess I'm just not that imaginative
I try to let go of the promises
That's all I can promise you

(repeat chorus)

Let me start over once again
And I'll love myself a little bit more

Minor updates:

1) I got my Nokia N73! And somehow it came with a 1GB MiniSD card. You have NO idea how incredibly happy I was when I found out that I didn't have to go out and buy another card with a few hundred bucks. The phone takes gorgeous pictures, and I can't wait to show it *cough* off* cough* to you folks. I mean, it's not the most expensive phone but it's simply one of my favorite. Especially when I don't have to pay a cent for it.

2) I'm changing my phone number to avoid some people. I'm still keeping the old number but I'm guessing I'll eventually change it. So now you can reach me at (+6)016 523 9880. And yes, the last four numbers are still there. It's sorta like a tradition. Runs in the family. Save this number.

3) I went out with friends tonight. Haven't seen some of them in a year. I'll be posting pictures (taken by my new phone *screams*) tomorrow if I can make it up early. It's 5.am. in the morning now and I'm not even asleep yet. There's too many thin

Have a gorgeous weekend babes.
Kev C.

One Day At Pavilion

2007-09-27T02:19:00.000+08:00

Alright. Here comes a post WITH pictures for September.
For the ones who wonder, I'm not a generally busy person.
But the connection speed at my place is simply so horrible, it takes me more than 2 minutes to view Google and 5 to just to open my Friendster page.
So, yeah, tau tak pe. ( I think it means 'now you know)
Anyways, as some of you might be aware of the grand opening of one of the few luxury malls in the hub of Kuala Lumpur- Pavilion had its grand opening last week.
For those who have no idea what or where Pavilion is, here are some pics:

One of the entrances to the building.
Some of the shops aren't opened yet though.

Just to let you folks get an idea, the food sold in Pavilion
is far from cheap. They have Food Republic, which is the first
in Malaysia, but I didn't manage to check it out. There's a
little place call Equos at LG and the egg sandwich was RM12.90.
And mushroom soup was RM6.90 (S). Yeah.

I need to say something here: All this pictures and the bubble texts are for personal entertainment purposes amongst friends. I do not know the people in the pictures personally nor was I aware of what they were talking or thinking while the picture is taken.

THESE PRANKS/JOKES ARE NOT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY.

Fine, back to the topic. So I walked around and there was a catwalk fashion show thingy for Stadium Sportswear and I must admit that some of the clothes are pretty nice. And the models weren't bad too. Just not the two white guys who looked as if they were picked up on the spot to fill in some absent models (they looked a bit too lost for comfort).

The place where the fashion show was held.
(note: they had mediocre PR)

After the show we went walking around until we were hungry and we went to Yo! Sushi for dinner. I wasn't (still not) a sushi person because I don't eat anything raw or exotic sea creatures. But I have to admit the food that night was pretty good. Here are some of the stuff we had. Take a look and pay the place a visit if you're into this kinda food.

Location: Lower Ground Floor, Pavilion Mall, Kuala Lumpur.

Beef Satay - RM 18
The beef s tender and saucy, awesome!

Spicy Chicken Katsu -RM8

Wasabi & Dill Salmon -RM 18

Yellowtail Hamachi -RM 15

Salmon Sashimi -RM 18

Fried Chicken Rice -RM 10
The portion was not as big as you're thinking, seriously.

Soft Shell Crab With Yuzu Tobiko -RM 10

Gyoza -RM 8
Fried chicken dumplings with soup. Quite nice.

Dorayaki -RM 8
Doraemon's favorite, anyone?

Mochi (Japanese Rice Cake) -RM 8
IMHO? This is a little bit overpriced.

Unknown -RM 5
Sorry, I forgot to take down the name of this.

Teriyaki Chicken -RM10
Your ordinary fried chicken.

Miso Black Cod -RM18
I didn't get to taste this, but they said it was amazing.

Eel & Cucumber -RM 10

Teriyaki Salmon -RM10
Best dish of the night, all of us LOVED it.

Takoyaki -RM 10
Greg loves it, so I tried. It was actually better than
what I had expected. Way better than the ones sold in OneU.

Special thanks to Mr Lewis for serving us all those
food. He introduced us to some of his personal favs too.
Oh, by the way, Yo! Sushi is originally from UK.

The dinner added up to approx. RM450 for all four of us.
Guess what, I didn't pay a cent.

After all that Jap food, we headed back to PJ and went straight to The Curve where Shaz's friend Amanda was waiting for us (sushi made us late). Here are more pictures from the new (or maybe old, I haven't hung out at The Curve for a while) place call The Apartment.

The place had this really homey design.

I think it's a little too comfy I nearly slept.

So Shaz, being his usual friendly self, threw this
little surprise thingy for Amanda.
According to her card, she's a songwriter, singer, model, performer,
emcee, public relations professional, host etc. Coooolll =)She's a darling, that one.
Her birthday was actually a few months ago though.
That's why the cake got downsized and all.

And guess what.
Happy Mooncake/Lantern/Mid-Autumn Festival.
May you always be with the ones you love.

G&G,
Kev C.

Angel's Suitcase (Part 1)

2007-09-15T19:19:00.000+08:00

Hey folks. September finally rolled in and due to my hectic college and gym and outing schedule I don't have quite much time to keep in touch with y'all. So I'm promising something even better. I'll be posting 10 songs this month onwards. All my personal favorites from the album 'Angel's Suitcase' from Zhao Wei. So if you don't have anything to read elsewhere and you feel that you need some good music to loosen you up (all puns intended), here are some goodies for you.

1. Old Toy (click here to download)

Maybe my hatred towards you is fading
After all this time I finally see what kind of lover you are
We're so over arguing about who's fault it was

I don't anymore wanna hear you say sorry
I don't anymore want your love
You're already a past
Just get out of my mind

You won't find a new toy
When you've got an old one hanging around
You know, I know
Even you said that there's a hot girl right there
Leave me alone, leave me alone
Just go do your thing

Don't just simply love me
Take all your rubbish with you
You've always been selfish
Don't just simply love me
Keep doing all the wrong things
Just let me have my freedom
Don't just simply love me
I don't wanna be let down
You'll always be lonely
Don't just simply love me
What can your love give me anyway?
I rather go home or walk away

(Note: The background music of the song is AWESOME)

2. Track 5: Butterfly (Click here to listen)

I chase for my dreams, all my life, never afraid of getting disappointed
In my heart, I've always believed that one day we'll meet again
Every time I fly, it's another long winding journey
But it doesn't mean just because I fight, I'd definitely touch the sky

I rest on the tip of a branch, having the most ridiculous dreams
I touch the heart of people but not because I want to be worshiped
No matter the dreams inside are gone or blurry
I can't choose to go back to my cocoon

Quietly, I see who I really need in my life
Quietly, I get used to the coldest of winds
I want to fly, no matter who those tears were for
I want to spread my wings and raise into the sky
I want my own freedom

I chase for my dreams, all my life, never afraid of getting disappointed
In my heart, I've always believed that one day we'll meet again
I'd go under every flower
Looking for the face of true admiration
When I look into this city there's still a radiant sky
Once I leave my cocoon everything will become the past
As long as I understand you, anything is possible

Update from Kevin:

1. I'm getting a new phone!! Dad got me the Nokia "Multimedia Computer" N73. Ooh! I've always wanted to get an N-series phone. They have the best features. I'll do a review on the phone soon. Hopefully I'll get the soon on next week when my dad comes by to KL. He's going to Beijing with his friends so I'm asking for some stuff, again.

2. Mass Media Law is actually quite interesting. But it being interesting has nothing to do with what I feel towards the subject because it's just SO complicated! Okay, maybe that's a little too over-the-top. I'm not the kind who pays too much attention in class, that must be the problem.

3. I hosted an event for the KDU's School Of Business and Administration last night. It was an early celebration for the Chinese Mooncake Festival. Small crowd but awesomely enthusiastic. It wasn't the best event I've hosted but it was my best performance. I'm not bragging or anything but the whole show would've gone down if I wasn't there to give them help and advice. The organization was baaaaad. But hey, it turned out well so.. Yay!

4. I'm having a rash!! The first time!! It hurts!! And it's so itchy!!

5. Greg is still in Czech Republic. He called last night with a pay-phone. He scored the highest for his country. But the team didn't win because the opponents were too good.

That's it. I'm going out to have dinner with Shaz later, I think. I'll cya guys in a few days!

G&G,
Kev C.

Happy National Day!

2007-08-31T00:33:00.000+08:00

Okay, I told myself that I was NOT going to leave this blog picture-less for my August so here I am making it a bit more.. picturesque. Have fun viewing and reading.

See? I can be patriotic too!
I know Malaysia has some good people in it.
Well, it's about damn time for us to shine.

So since we're back with the beaches, here are a few more from Perhentian that I got from my collection. [Thanks Eman for the pictures ]

I don't even remember having this one taken.
Notice how clear the waters were?

Whoever took this photo must've hated me a lot.
Or he/she's in need for some photography classes again.

I just received the pay last week.
Some people say it's quick money.
I can do SO much better than that.

Guess who scored top sales?
( Hint: Me. )
With much help from Tsu and Jovie, of course!

And finally! Pictures from my birthday dinner.

I'm not sure if it applies to everyone but..
I can't remember the wish I made.
I actually don't remember what I wished for in the past.

A few days later I went back to Ipoh. Apparently my parents had totally forgotten when they gave birth to me. You know, I would've made a big deal if I had been the world's cutest baby but they said Sunny (yes, him again) was the cutest so.. Blah. Whatever. And I went to this outdoor concert with my brothers (yes, them again).

So yeah, Moon was there and we took this picture with my phone and the night mode provided us with below-average quality so I made it better (or worse) with ACD Editor because my dad's lappie doesn't have Photoshop.

Do we still look exactly the same? Gawd I hope not.

A few days later back in KL, I finally got the guts to follow Andre and Sid to go rock-climbing. And it was actually quite fun even though I fell like, two hundred and seventy six times. And here's Andre being.. herself.

Nah, I made her do it.

And after a few days of boring college which I'm not going to babble about, I went out to futsal with the boys again. Marianne tagged along but that might as well be what she only did because she was hurt within five minutes. Poor girl =X

And did I mention that I was hit by the ball in the balls twice?

And the next day, I went to Moon's convocation.

The whole family showed up to congratulate her.
I just don't have all the photos.
And can someone hand us some facial wipes or something?

I know, random. I don't even remember which day this was.
I was outta gym with the chi.. girls and they dragged me all
the way to Hartamas to try the "infamous BBQ chicken".
They somehow forgot to tell me that it's also insanely expensive
for friend chicken that don't taste good.

And this is taken today before I left college.
The food was errr.. not decent.
Is there anyone from H&T here? Don't kill me aite?

Anyway, fun month. College started and got some new lecturers with us this semester. It looks like a pretty damn boring one but I'm sure we'll get the best out of it. I'm going for an interview this coming Tuesday/Wednesday and my hosting and singing abilities would be put to test(s). Wish me loads and loads of luck.

And oh, I think I might be hosting a Mooncake Festival Gala for the folks from Business School. I didn't charge them though. They said they were gonna buy me a drink so I was thinking that it was more than enough since they aren't making any money out of the event anyways. Do show them some support if you happen to come across any of their occasions.

It's already 2am at night and I have six hours to sleep before I leave the country to go shopping in Thailand. Apparently going there is unbelievably cheap because dad got us into this really awesome four-star-ish hotel for less than RM350. Two suites! Haha. And yeah, I'm gonna shop like MAD over there since, ya know, things are cheaper at the other side of the fence.

And till then. Happy Birthday Malaysia.
Maybe, just maybe, Malaysia Boleh.

Warmest regards,
Kev C.

20Y0

2007-08-26T20:05:00.000+08:00

I turned 20 on the 6th of August.
And I felt the same, mainly.
It doesn't feel too different, being a year older.
I looked back a little.
Okay, maybe I looked back a lot.
And I realized that last year went by like a dream.
A dream unveiling itself with every step I take.
It was a dream full of surprises, suspense, rewards.
It had it's ups and downs.
It also made me become a step closer to what I want to be.
Who I want to be with. Where I want to go.
Yes, it was an awesome year. So to speak.
I look forward to celebrating more birthdays in my twenties =P
Owh well. I'm NOT in denial. LMAO.

And I'm sorry I've been neglecting the blog.
I wasn't. Not neglecting anyways.
I *still* haven't got the pictures taken on my birthday.
And also the ones taken at other occasions.
I'll update asap alright?

So many things happened.
And there's so much more to come.
Stand by me. As we will it, so mote it be.

Wish me well,
Kevin C.

Pictures On The Other Side

2007-07-31T21:08:00.000+08:00

The wait is over! FINALLY a post with pictures! Well, all of them are from my trip to Perhentian last week. No nudity but you can stretch your imagination if you want to.

We reached Kuala Besut six-ish and had a helluva
breakfast there. The speedboat was scheduled at 7am so after
a not-so-hearty breakfast, we boarded and made our
way to our destination- Perhentian Island. One of the islands in the
world that offers the clearest of sea waters and most exotic underwater sceneries.

This baby here is barely a month old. Two weeks to be exact.
There were an entire pond of newly hatched sea turtles and
they were delicious.. I mean, endearing and adorable. Haha, can't
believe I said the 'd' word. We're supposed to ROAR for animal rights.
But no, seriously, the turtles on the island are protected.
Playing with them was all we could do lol.

D'Lagoon was the name of our chalet. It wasn't too bad.
But it wasn't as pleasant as we expected it to be.
But they served us better-than-decent food so I'm giving
them a little bit of credit. Just that the rooms were
quite dusty. But hey, it's a beach-side chalet..

You have NO idea how painful it was when I stepped on this.

I'm not sure who they belonged to. Could've been Wykit
cos he was the only one who brought fruits there.

Lunch! We were FAMISHED! And it tasted AWESOME!

This fine lady can eat! She cleans up even the last piece
of goddamn watermelon. And she's stick thin.

Feast your eyes.

I know I'm gonna get a 'wtf' from Eman but I don't care.
This is just too precious of a picture to be kept to myself.
And while the boys are out somewhere havinfg fun..
Look what I found.
Then Arthur and I went playing with those yummy..
I mean adorable turtles again! Oooh! They're so
cute I could eat them up! Figuratively speaking, mind you.
And here's Jasmine's best friend Lizzard McGuire.The locals said that it was venomous. While I didn't
have the honor to be killed by it's deadly poison, I did
see a couple of European tourists trying to agitate the dragon.
And it flipped its tail in a very, very mean way.
Bad bad dragon!

And that's the last dinner we had there. I'm not even going to
post the pictures because we ate like we've never eaten before.

Alrighty folks. That's all for now. It took me a while to upload these because my connection was -and has always been- a piece of shit. For more pictures, check out Euphoric Eman and Average Kid's blogs. My pictures are all taken by Nokie 7610 and SE W800i so the quality, of course, can not be compared to theirs. Wells, hope you had fun reading. I'm off to beed. Good night peeps =)

Gregrified & Gregistered,
Kevin C.

Start Of Something Old

2007-07-29T22:25:00.000+08:00

I think I'm making this blog private and personal. It's getting the publicity that it shouldn't possibly be getting and having someone I have no idea of sneaking up to me and ask if I were going to update it on a weekend is seriously not what I expected. So from now on, very little pictures, probably less captions or add-ons and very boring and mundane stuff with little play on words. You're going to be very, very bored. Get out of here.

Otherwise, enjoy the mundaneness.

Exams

Copywriting: I got highest among my maties for my mid-term exam and also highest in my final paper. Guess I should really pursue a career in copywriting after all.

Public Relations: 34/40 for my mid-term paper. 23/30 for my PR project which I put in every single last bit of heart and soul into. Some did less. Some did nothing. And they scored more than I did. It's unfair, I know. But it's a lesson I had to learn. And I did all I could. The last paper was okay. I answered all six questions in the final section where I only needed to answer four. But I knew all the answers so I suppose it wouldn't turn out too bad.

Desktop Publishing: The final paper was fine. I got 18/20 for my movie poster project. So I'm keeping my fingers crossed for an A. I'm actually not a freak who goes crazy over grades, but I'm a freak who knows my own strengths and weaknesses and will not tolerate any misconduct when I can help it. Yeap, I'm a freak!

News-Writing for E-Media: It was 20 times easier than what I expected. I found out that I had some wrongs here and there but otherwise, it's all good. My group was the highest for the group project so I'm guessing a B+ wouldn't be too much of a problem.

Media Planning: I did NOT fail. Praise the LORD. Give me a B. PLEASE.

Perhentian Island
The pictures will have to come in the later posts so if you wanna leave, now would be the perfect time. Anyway, the place was PERFECT! I have never seen such clear waters in my life and the underwater experience is two-thousand times better than Redang Island! Great food (I even enjoyed the nasi lemak they served) and a stunning view. Too bad not everyone liked it there. I'm fine cos I grew up in wooden houses. I'm sorry you didn't enjoy the trip because I was technically in heaven and I could see that you were in hell. Sorry again.

Love, Love, Love
It's a full moon tonight. And it's our first full moon. Yeah, you can probably guess that we're new. The thing is, this time it's different. I've never felt so strongly about a person. And I've never felt so vulnerable before. I'm not sure. More babblings coming soon.

Life

It's my BIRTHDAY!! Haha, not today. Less then ten days I guess. Message me by phone if you'd like to join the party. And I'll make sure it's affordable because I'm just as broke =) And oh, I was working in college today and it was open day so a lotta new folks came to take a look and this one lady actually came up to me and asked if I had done anything in public before. Apparently she recognized my from one of the events I hosted a few months back. Wow. And guys, I'll be working in KLCC during the PC fair so drop by and say hi =)

Loves,
Kevin C.

Up, Up, and Perhentian Here We Come!!

2007-07-24T12:00:00.000+08:00

You are always on my mind.
You are always on my mind.

I think I'm in love.
More productive posts will come after my Perhentian trip. And meanwhile, miss me a little. And get my presents ready. Although all I need is a message wishing me happy.

Smile.

The Uncommon Magic in Unchained Memories

2007-07-16T00:50:00.000+08:00

I believe there's magic in life even though I have no interest in talking about religions or it's miraculous influences. I think we've all had magic in our lives. Some of us, who are lucky, still do. Magic gave us the opportunity to meet new people, do awesome things, encounter exciting events, fall in love, etc. It gave us will to carry on when all hope is lost. It strengthens our faith when we try not to believe. It makes every life colourful. It makes every moment memorable.

I just hope magic was enough for me to hold on to. Because the memories are starting to fade. The magic has lost its spark. The unchained are beginning to meld. The uncommon has been too little for any of us to count on or look forward to.

I try to smile but it's in vain when you're gone.
I try to stay but it's in vain when you're far.
I try to run but my past is always behind me.
I'm on the run to wherever you are.

Do you believe in magic? It's time to believe it.
Because, my friend, having you here, is the uncommon magic in my life.

I just wish I'm the magic in yours too.
Kevin C.

p/s: I just found out that the last post I wrote was actually written on Friday the 13th. Not that the day means anything to me but hey, you've heard the stories. Haha.

Happy Ending (for now)

2007-07-13T18:47:00.000+08:00

This is the way you left me
I'm not pretending
No hope, no love, no glory
No happy ending.
This is the way that we love
Like it's forever
Then live the rest of our life
But not together

Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life
Can't get no love without sacrifice
If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well
A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell

This is the hardest story that I've ever told
No hope, or love, or glory
Happy endings gone forever more
I feel as if I feel as if I'm wasted
And I'm wastin' everyday

This is the way you left me
I'm not pretending
No hope, no love, no glory
No happy ending.
This is the way that we love
Like it's forever
Then live the rest of our life
But not together

You can download the song (performed by Mika) by clicking here.
Do support him and BUY his latest album: Life In Cartoon Motion.

It's exam week so I'll be posting relatively less. Yes, praise the lord you're not hearing from me again but as a semester comes to an end, another one starts, which means a whole new level of annoyance. It feels like yesterday that I had gone to Benjamin's house before the first Public Relations class. It feels like last week that I didn't like Ms Sharmila. Scratch that, I still don't admire her lack of leniency. She gave me a 22/30 for News Writing and a 23/30 for Copywriting and that's actually the highest mark in class. How pathetic can it be? And OH-EM-GEE I got only 23 for my event from Ms Naomi. I shouldn't even have cared (or done) so much.

I feel like I'll be getting a whole lotta B pluses this semester. It's not that they're not good, it's just that they're not up to my standards. And where am I supposed to get the scholarship? *Sighs* And oh, my face is -yet again- on Campus Plus. And I know it's an unflattering image of moi but puhleeease. Other than that, I've also paid forty bucks to join this Philips Ambassador Search contest. Winner gets RM2000. I don't care about the whole fame-or-no-fame deal. I'd be able to get a premium membership in my gym if I can get my hands on that money and also the RM5000 worth of Philips products and the chance the grace the cover of a male magazine. So, we'll see what happens. I'm actually not in the mood to do the whole talent showcase deal (yes, I'm over the self-proving period) but you've gotta work for money right?

So yeah, here are my plans for the coming weeks.

17-20th July: Exams
21st July: Hosting a company dinner for Quantum International
23rd July: Final paper (desktop publishing)
24th July: Movie marathon with friends
25-27 July: Trip to Perhentian Island with friends
28 & 29 July: Working as KDU promoter (RM90 for 2 days wei!)
30th July onwards: Probably going back to Ipoh and celebrate my big day

I'm not sure when the next semester starts but I'm definitely hyped up about Film Studies. And somehow I don't want to be the camera person this time. Assistant director would be enough to satisfy me. Or a minor role in the film. Who wants me in the group!?!?

ROAR Unlimited

2007-07-07T15:18:00.000+08:00

Before the ROAR pictures, here are some of the pictures I've taken recently.

She dragged me up to sing. I hated it.
I hate singing impromptu especially
when theres hundreds of people watching.

Ain't she a darling? =)

Remember what I wrote in my previous blog post?

See the blood stains. They were all over the road.

And here are the pictures you asked for. Don't get turned off just by the first picture. It was purely blatant self promotional.

Wah.. So yeng right? Say yes.

Will's expression is kinda funny.
And hey! That's the guy from Estranged
and Shaz from Xfresh. Cool peeps.

After the first day. It was so tiring.
I think all of us hoped it was over right then.

This is taken when the folks were doing
the backdrop. We just needed something to do.

I don't really pay too much attention to
Malaysia's music scene but these are
really nice people! Haha!

Second day: And we weren't sure
which camera to look at.

In other words, we're simply being ourselves.

I'm still proud I came up with the design.
Yes, I'm bragging. But it's so pretty lol.

Tsoon Kit was a bit ecstatic. But you really
gotta give us some credit to still be able
to smile after doing the entire backdrop. This picture
is taken then day before ROAR.

And these pics are taken on the official Cheque-giving Ceremony of ROAR. We brought in some food so that everyone could feast after the wrap. It's sorta like a wrap party. Come to think of it.

Yeah, that's about it.

Arthur really needs to get a life.

Spilled Blood

2007-07-05T20:18:00.000+08:00

I was walking back to my house after working out at the gym when I heard a girl screaming on the top of her lungs. A motorcycle was around 200 meters in front of me and the cyclist was trying to rob a girl of her handbag. The girl was being dragged on the road like a helpless rag doll as she held on to her bag, bouncing on the harsh rocks, arms stretched, trying hard to let go of her bag but it was clung to her shoulder. The motorcyclist had no intention to let her loose as he sped across the evening road. Neighbors emerged from their homes shouting scared the snatch-thief, forcing him to accelerate to an even deadlier speed. The girl's terrifying shrieks did not stop the motorist, but the men's waving arms and bats did. He swung the girl to the side of the road with brutal force and fled right past me. Everything happened within 15 seconds.

I ran towards the girl, just like the other neighbors. She was bleeding badly. Her ankles, legs, arms were bruised and severely scratched. Her hair was a mess as she was being tolled on cold, hard road. Somehow the men didn't want to touch her. And I tossed my gym bag on the roadside and carried her to a girl's car nearby and she kindly took the horrified student to a nearby hospital. And then everybody went home. The neighbors, meanwhile, were all mouths.

I wonder what they would do if it was their daughter. Would they still be reluctant to give the girl a hand when she was down on her knees sobbing, crying in pain and trembling in fear? I was the one who carried the girl, and another teenage female driver drove her to the clinic. What's happening to compassion and kindness? Where did all the bullshit go? Where's the neighborhood ronda folks when you need them? Why can't anyone do something other than saying "Oh my god, look at her!" and "Oh my god, what happened?" or "Oh my god, that was scary!"

Can you practice what you preach?

There's always bad people in the world. I remember saying that I was willing to give my eyes if there could be world peace if I did. And my friends laughed at me because they thought I was silly. It's not about the possibility, it's about the thought. It's about the willingness to help. The urge to lose and gain something. The ability to see the bigger picture. The love for others besides oneself. Can't you understand?

When people asked me why ROAR for animal rights? Why not for women or kids? I answered, "If a person is able to treat animals and insignificant beings with love, respect and tenderness, how do you think he would treat the ones like him?"

You don't complain about the government when there's a fault within the system. You can't expect the people around you to make change. You shouldn't think that small things you do don't matter because at the end, they do. Be a part of the solution. It doesn't make you a hero-of-the-hood carrying a hurt girl to a car, but it wouldn't hurt if you did. I washed the blood off my hands and wished her well before I closed the door and watch the car drove away.

Make a difference, Malaysians. You "boleh", too. We have the power to shape the country. We have the ability to shape the society. When you hear Singaporeans look down on us, you blame them for being 'kia su', but look at ourselves! Are you better than that? Can you be better than what you already are? Can you make things better for the people around you?

I wish you well.

The guy who lives down the street,
Kevin C.

A Little More Personal

2007-07-01T22:52:00.000+08:00

The Fantastic Roar: Rise of the KDU ARC

2007-06-27T16:08:00.000+08:00

Kevin, Will Q and Caryn.
the hosts of ROAR (2nd day)

Just so you know. Naomi Ishak is our lecturer!
Hahaha, and she's very cool lol.

The big show - Stripped.

Estranged! I have never heard their songs

before but I'm def-ly a supporter.

They are such nice folks!

Second day after the closing ceremony.
Spot me. I'm loud.

Caryn and me hosting the 2nd day of ROAR.
Trust me, it's not as easy as it seems.

ARC leaders being interviewed by
a reporter from The Sun.

We're, like, awesome. Like, totally. Hahas.

Stay tuned for more. Spoofed ones! *Arthur you are SO dead*

Morality Bites

2007-06-12T03:09:00.000+08:00

Load this video and read the post and you'll be watching one of the funniest things shown on national television when you're done reading.

Imagine yourself at a crossroads where you need to decide whether you should be an honest friend who says blatantly mean truths or a nice friend who says, "it's okay, everything is going to work out fine." What would you choose?

I think 2007 has been quite a year. And we're only talking about the first half of it. I know I'm not as good as those geniuses who started making huge-ass money since 17 but hey, things ARE looking good. A lotta new opportunities at work and at love, I haven't got too much to complain.

Anyway, I rejected someone today. A girl. She was completely in shock when she found out that I was.. er.. you know.. engaged. She's the fourth girl I rejected this year. Weird, when I was in high-school being the nerdiest fatso kid ever, no one even cared to throw a glimpse at me. Looks really do matter a lot I guess. And me scoring more by losing 15kgs proved that.

I talked to William Quah today too. He's actually a very professional person. I sent him some sorta fan mail and he replied just how a normal friend would. He was one of the three people who made me come to study mass communication in KL. So yes, if it wasn't for him impressing me simply by reading the news, I wouldn't be here.

It meant a lot to me to have him actually gave me real advices and asking me to keep in touch. And ugh, I actually checked my last post and noticed that I kidded that I wanted to "screw" him. It's a joke. Or maybe I was just too excited to see him. Anyways, he's not on my to-'do'-list. You are. Haha. But um, since a lot of my friends are media students, I'll share a portion of his reply to my "fan mail" with you guys.

"I always like to make sure people know that the work I do in front of the camera is just the tip of the iceberg. I've worked primarily as a writer, producer, content creator and brand marketeer for the last 6 years, but the on camera stuff is definitely a nice way to make pocket money. Basically, what I'm trying to say here is don't get into this business for the glitz and glamour... believe me, it's there, but it's not in as huge a supply as you'd think. Instead, get into this industry with the right mindset, to change, develop, and educate a fledgling industry in an under developed country. Think of everything you love about foreign media, and dedicate yourself to bringing it here, even if it doesn't seem to ever take off. But persevere. Do that, and you'll be doing yourself, and your country, a favour."

He's SO my idol. Full-stop. And he IS coming to R.O.A.R, Ray. He IS. Now go back up and watch the uber funny video from Mad TV.

The Best Damn Thing.. Err, Things

2007-06-09T16:11:00.000+08:00

Omigod guys~! This has by far been the best darn week of my LIFE! Seriously, last week I was having problems with my dad and this week...

(i) I signed a 1-year modeling/ambassador contract with Watson's Malaysia! I'll be doing photo spreads, TV commercials, infomercials, charity/public appearances and press conferences. I might even land a role in their sponsored TV series if I'm that lucky. And I get decent pay every day i work with them so the money is easy and really effortless. Muahahahaha! And oh, I acually have a monthly allowance in Watson's, which directly translates into I'll never have to worry about shampoo, shavers, sunscreen, snacks, condoms, lubricants for the eyes when I'm wearing contacts, lubricants for other purposes, conditioners and did I mention condoms and lubricants?

(ii) I have confirmed that I'll be hosting the second day of R.O.A.R. It's our class's PR project and it'll be a campaign about raising awareness about animal rights and there'll be press and celebrities and so on. No pay but great exposure. And oh, William Kuah is gonna be there! He's one of my inspirations to have come to studying mass communication. So yeah, I'm really looking forward to screwing.. err, seeing him. And yeah, Joey G and other celebrities are coming too. But I don't know them to well.

(iii) I am hosting a company banquet in KL for FusionExcel. The pay is nothing too impressive, it's the same amount of my monthly allowance so I won't complain anyway. But there will be extremely big people. Some of the most influential people in the business industry is going to be there and I'll meet all of them! Haha, you can practically imagine how badly I'm gonna suck up right? Hopefully I'll score another gig by socializing around.

(iv) I finished ALL my assignments. It might sound nothing to you but.. most of them are group or team assignments but I have to take on a huge amount of work because 1) only Kah Meng is able to really help in doing Media Planning and 2) Jovie had her own stuff to manage so I had to finish the movie poster by myself in a day.

(v) I got a 3-month free membership at Fitness First. They had a lucky draw cum scratch and win thingy so Irene, Adele, Belinda and I gave it a shot. Belinda and Adele won a one and two week membership respectively. Irene and I got the grand prize. The three month membership is worth around RM450. Yeah, you can practically start hating me now.

(vi) I went for a date! Haha, one that I actually looked forward to. One that turned out well with no additional sex in the public toilet! Not that I've done that before. But the date went really well, and it had been 7 months since I last dated so.. It's all good =)

That's it! Call me a brag but those are the things I really want to share with you folks. And here's a special 'Thank You' for all of you who believed in me that I could somehow do the things I like to do, and even make money out of it. I can't believe how great the week went either but I'm keeping my fingers crossed about the upcoming events. Wish me luck y'all.

And yeah, for the sake of posting, here are the pictures I took in the past week or so. Knock yourselves out. Just so if you *still* do not know, I have enabled anonymous commenting. So anyone can comment on a post without having to log in. If you're too lazy to click and wait into the comment page, try the Chatterbox on the right. It would appear on your bottom right of the page if you're not a user of Mozilla FireFox.

First of all, I've gotta send all my birthday lurve to the world's best dad ever. Period!I wish I'll look as young as he is when I'm 45.

Back to normal college stuff, the girls brought me to Nando's cos they say 'it's really worth it'.
And this cost me RM12.90.

You know what they say when students doze off in class because the can't stad the boredom. But what does a metrosexual dream of when he's asleep?
Apparently, he dreams ALL about himself.

Meet my darling-est friend.
The first -and better- picture was actually a candid shot. She seriously can't pull off the bicep-flexing pose.

Jove, Adele and Divya went to Ipoh last week to fetch me back to KL and also to check out a few places and have the popular Ipoh foods. Jovie was so tired when she reached Ipoh so I asked her to use to Osim chair to wake herself up. But apparently she got even more relaxed.I literally had to drag her into the car cos we're going to Cameron Highland.

We went to the infamous Strawberry Farm and got ourselves strawberry and banana covered ice-cream.Ahhh. Eating ice-cream in the cool hill-weather was heavenly.

Divya takes her craziness to a whole new level.
The girl doesn't even have to act crazy. Impressive.

And oh, looked what they found.

I bet their milkshakes bring new land to the yard...

Ooh, Adele has a car and now she's driving to school! Yippie!
If you can't read the words under the title, they are "Don't smoke and you get teeth just like ours."

So yeah, don't smoke. And support Watson's. Haha. Cya guys!

Loves.

Good Things VS "The" Bad Thing

2007-05-28T01:42:00.000+08:00

No, I did not copy this from anywhere else. Just read it. Pictures will be placed at the bottom of the post because I have to get something important off my mind.

Life is not easy. It is about making the best decisions. Maybe not the right ones but at least they don't come back and bite you in the ass. If someone tells you life is an easy game, they're lying. For every decision you make comes results. And for every action you take comes effects. And aftermaths. And consequences.

Consequences. This is such a assertive word, don't you think? Consequences are never really escapable. It is th outcome of what you have done. They say do the right thing and you'll face less consequences. I don't remember how we "do the right thing". Who decides what is right and wrong? When I was little I knew it was wrong to lie. When I've grown up as I am now I know lying is not just about deceiving people. It's about covering up your ass. It's protection. And all of us need a little bit of protection some times. And then there's consequences. Talk about your karma.

There is little our parents tell us about the world when we were small. Toddlers have no sense of how dangerous their future might become. We can't blame them. We wouldn't understand anyway. I wouldn't. If my mother told me, be good to others so they will be nice to you too, I'd take it. If she said, never do bad things or you'll land in hell, I'd take that. If she said, don't talk to the bitch in class cos she's just gonna be a bad person to you in return, I would wonder why. And luckily, my mom didn't say anything about bitches. And so there wasn't any back when I was little. Everything was just clouds and chocolate bars and toys and more chocolate bars. No bitches. No jerks. Nada. Zilch. There was only the good and the bad. And they weren't too hard to be define which is which.

Growing up must have been joyful. But I don't really remember all the good stuff. The bad things that happened, however, stay within the memory. No one knows why the human mind remembers bad things better than good ones. But it's undeniable. The way I perceive it? We do remember. It's just that the good things make us feel good. The bad things make us feel bad. And by human nature, most of us wouldn't like to feel bad. And so we remember. The good, the bad, they all happened to us. We just remember the bad better because, well, it's bad.

I don't remember a lot of bad things. Call me a hypocrite. But I like to remember the small things. The ones that make the heart goes warm for a split second and you sigh and say, "whoa, great times, awesome people". I try not to be too pessimistic, I think a lot of us do that once in a while. Reassuring ourselves that life is just not as bad as it may seem.

You must be wondering why I'm typing this load of whatever-you-wanna-call-it. Well, while it's kinda obvious that something is bothering me, you wouldn't find out if I don't spill. I know it's none of your business and you can probably stop here if you want to. We both know you have better things to do.

It's my dad. He found out about my sexual orientation. And it's the first time I saw him look so sad. It was not disappointment. It was not disgrace. It was just sorrow. One that I know will never be cured. Not this time.

He asked me why. Why. WHY!? Tell me, GOD, why!? I couldn't answer him. I don't know. I really don't. You would think that I'm happy the way things are. But don't you think I want to be just like the others too sometimes? Being what I am now is a burden. One that I can't bear for the rest of my life, knowing that this burden hurts the ones I love.

"Do you know how sad mom would fee if she found out about this?"
"Didn't I always tell you? We are always here for you."
"You were such a normal boy. What happened to you?"
"Do you know how hard we work just to get you into college? Just to ensure that you'll have a better life? We do not do that for ourselves. We do it for you."
"We love you so much, why do you be just like the others?"

There was no accusation in his voice. I believe he had been thinking it through since he saw the porn in my computer. There wasn't anger or disbelief. There was just sadness and the need to know what went wrong. And there was none. Dad was awesome. He still is. So yes, GOD, do tell me why I like men over girls. Do tell me why.

I feel so dirty sometimes. I feel like such a loser to bring my parents down. Even though my mom doesn't know and my dad didn't look as if he had any interest in sharing the news that the son she is proudest of would not be bringing her home a girl, one day she will sense that something is wrong. I know this day will happen sooner or later. I just wished it wouldn't be this difficult. I don't want to disappoint. But I know I will.

The other day I woke up with a raging hardon and I said to myself, "gosh I haven't had sex in almost half a year". And call me crazy but I actually had the urge to just go fuck someone random. Fortunately, it was just an urge.

Urges can be fun. They come on different sizes. Bigger ones demand attention while smaller urges can be simply laughed off and wiped off the upper left corner of your brain. I don't call myself a person with too brilliant of a mind, so I never kept track of how many bigger urges I have in life compared to small and seemingly useless ones. But I think the sexual urge I hadin the morning was pretty self explanatory.

I used to, still do sometimes, have the urge of becoming someone popular. Like some sort of celebrity. I actually have no idea where that come from. I mean, I know I'm not good looking. That's established since I hit puberty. It's just that I like performing, being on stage give me the power I want. The power to influence the people looking at you. Being able to influence is being powerful. And information is power. And knowledge is information. But that's not the reason I came to college. I just like communication studies.

And oh, you know why I don't want to be famous? Because I know what I would do. I would probably fuck around with different people. I love fucking around. I mean, I love the idea of it. But you can't do that when the media has it's eyes laid on your ass. And I mean it literally.

I know. I'm a million contradictions. Sometimes I make no sense. But it's life, you can't just sit around a figure everything out. I like going out. But let's just stop there.

And you know what, blogging does help.

Well, here are the pictures from the past few weeks. I know, finally, right?

First of all, sending all my -belated- birthday love to these three pretty girls. Shivani turned 19 on 15th May, Jackie turned 22 on 16th, and Andre turned 22 on 22nd. Happy Birthday~!

Shivani better puts off that thing fast
or it's gonna put her whole face off lol.

Ms Jackie proves to be a very, very
tiny-framed counsellor. Seriously, the cup was
NOT that far from her face.

Andre looked gorgeous in college that day.
Well, thanks to the necklace I bought her!
Muahahahah! Love this gurl!

Here's one for you guys to download.

And here's another one. Although, Benjamin, you
can at least look happy little but after getting
your hair done professionally!

Ms Sharmila teaches us with ease.
She is SUCH a pro.

Another night at La Queen was even more fun than the first. Divya joined us this time and I'm sure she had a huge blast. There was bubbles shooting out from the ceilings and free condom and lubricants and drag queens and ultra hot mat sallehs and bootylicious leather dancers with S&M whips and guys who grabbed asses and a guy who looked like Edric but WAY hotter and guys with pacs on their abs more than you can count with a single hand and guys kissing and guys grinding and guys making out in the toilet and guys shoving their tongues down Kevin's throat and sweaty musclemen kissing Adele and Divya ang white girls in bikinis and hot couples displaying affection and oh my god I saw the hottest men in my life ever but he had a boyfriend! And I was already too tired kissing the bunch of strangers. It's kinda weird the intimacy the force upon you like you're best friends or something when I clearly have no idea who the hell they are. Gawd. We're definitely going there again.

Call me insane but Jeanie reminds me off a cat
in this picture. Worst part is, she reminds
me of Sam's cat! Meeowww bitches!

(Kevin in Desktop Publishing class)
-Picture taken by Marianne-

Kevin and Kathy. Wow. One year in college.
Talk about the wear and tear.

That's all folks. Thanks for checking in to Unchamories once in a while. I am really flattered that you guys actually like it. And Edric, I think you typed more word than I did. But I'm not counting so.. Yeah, love you peeps. Enjoy your mid-term break y'all =)

Captivated Moments

2007-05-13T21:32:00.000+08:00

Oh, here's another nicer picture we took at
Neway, you guys might wanna download it.

I found this Shitzu at Petronas.
It has a hell of a bitchy attitude and thank
GAWD Jimmy has taken it off my hands.
Quite cute though.

Any captions needed? Don't think so.

Yes Sam, another perfect angle! Ish!!

Just another day in class.
But a lot of us wore hoods this day.

I got Edric a wallet. But it looks like he'd
have prefered a smaller penis for once.
Too bad I don't have a small penis. All puns intended.
*I can't believe I just typed that*

I think I'm the scariest. What do you think?

This is one heck of an Adele picture.
She looked so good at the gay club.
Too bad all the subjects were, well, gay.

Jynn looks SO pretty in this picture.
I was at her palace (not a spelling mistake)
to take the portfolio pictures for the Breakthru dancers
that night. As usual, followed by mamak.

We were in the "Flower Fuckface" Competition
together. Doesn't she remind you of someone?

And finally, an awesome picture of
Sunny (the "hot" brother whateverthefug),
Esmond (the "not as hot but better than Kevin" one)
Mom and me. Happy mother's day y'all!
Time to show some lurve~!

Mom actually made a new aussie friend and she read my fortune. Or whatever she called it. She said I'm "enthusiastic, arrogant, creative" and "has lots of friends" and "will marry someone after dating her for not very long" and "will be extremely rich" but my "urge to always be the top and better than everyone else" will "make me a never-too-happy person".

Hmm, I kinda like the sound of that. Who wants to marry me? =P

Baby Comes Back

2007-05-09T18:41:00.000+08:00

Oooh! What a wonderful wonderful week it is with my gorgeous Nokia 7610 back with me. For y'all who didn't know, I sent my phone for "refreshing" a couple of weeks ago, which explains the lack of pictures in my blog since then. And now I got it back. Woots!!

First of all, I'm gonna give all my burveday lurve to my one and only grandpa who turns 95 last Saturday. Big guy has been through so much he couldn't really remember how old he was. But luckily he was able to tell who I was when I greeted him :">

Awww. I ain't gonna spoof you grams.
Smile a little =D

Community reach, if y'all know what I mean.

I went to One Utama yesterday to watch Spiderman 3 with my friends. The movie was nothing too fancy to shout about other than SPIDERMAN'S STUNT DOUBLE HAS ONE OF THE GREATEST MOST AWESOME-LICIOUS BOOTY IN HOLLYWOOD FILM HISTORY!!! Those buns alone worth more than the ticket money you're paying. Other than that, the movie lived up to it's standard *at least*. And it wasn't as bad as the second sequel. Amazing special effects and decent acting and a few sizzling hot guys in tight suits and there goes another box office hit.

But before the movie, we had a quick karaoke session at Neway and here are the photos.

Posers. But come on, tell me I look good.
And that's Anne with her new glasses.

Don't you just love oldies? Songs, not people.

Don't kill me Jazzmeena, you DO look
a little constipated there hun.

I went to Low Yat Plaza just now to get myself a Hard Disk. I should've got one back during the PC fair because the price has apparently gone from RM130 to RM185. And it was SO overbudget. But then again, I can't complain, more porn for me. Hahahaha!

Nah, not really. More Heroes. Charmed. Prison Break. Desperate Housewives. House. Lost. And um.. maybe a little bit of porn wouldn't hurt but... that's not to share with you here.

Have an awesome week guys. Loves.

Remificated @ La Queen

2007-05-03T20:50:00.000+08:00

My latest picture taken with Divya, Cheryl Samad
and the event manager from Watson's that
just so happened to come from KDU as well.
Cheryl was SO pretty. Argh~!!!!

Heard a Brit song on radio while riding on Jovie's car the other day. Honestly, I've never felt anything when I heard this song back in the older days because I hadn't been in love when I was 14. Trust me, you wouldn't want to be my friend if you knew me back then. I looked like the nerdiest kid in the neighborhood, sadly. Back to the brighter present, I found myself listening to the lyrics and realized that it actually says a little bit of my story too. I'll continue after the lyric.

"Never look back," we said
How was I to know I'd miss you so?
Loneliness up ahead, emptiness behind
Where do I go?

And you didn't hear
All my joy through my tears
All my hopes through my fears
Did you know, still I miss you somehow

From the bottom of my broken heart
There's just a thing or two I'd like you to know
You were my first love, you were my true love
From the first kisses to the very last rose
From the bottom of my broken heart
Even though time may find me somebody new
You were my real love, I never knew love
'Til there was you
From the bottom of my broken heart

"Baby," I said, "please stay.
Give our love a chance for one more day"
We could have worked things out
Taking time is what love's all about

But you put a dart
Through my dreams through my heart
And I'm back where I started again
Never thought it would end

You promised yourself
But to somebody else
And you made it so perfectly clear
Still I wish you were here

"Never look back," we said
How was I to know I'd miss you so?

Wonder why I'm sharing the lyric? I went to La Queen with a couple of friends the other night. It can be considered my first time clubbing. Scratch that, it IS my first time clubbing because the only time I went to a a place with dim lights and deafening music was back on my Graduation night. Shutter 8 was, well, crap.

Anyways, call me crazy but I've always wanted to go to a gay club because EVERYONE who went told me that they had really good music at gay clubs and bars and the people are very friendly yada yada yada. Well, here's my story.

We were driving towards KL as fast as we could to be there before 11pm as the cover charge would be RM30 if we're later than that. But damn, it was already 11:20 when we arrived. La Queen is the new Novol, located beside Ruums KL and right next to the famous thai club. Adele was asked to show her ID while walking in and THANK GAWD she look confident and bitchy enough to shake off that bouncer or one of us would've been left out. And trust me, there's more than a lot to leave out in a gay club like that.

It was an event night so you can imagine the crowd. It wasn't as packed when we went in considering the time and people were just chilling at their tables with their friends or partners and omigod Remi was right above us on the second floor. I saw Benny when I observed the place and took a mental note of where the action.. erm, toilet was. So I waved at him and he looked at me in an extremely surprised/troubled manner as he nudged someone beside him and when he turned back, my heart nearly stopped. Remi.

He looked at me and I just turned to Adele and said "SHIT." And the entire night I've got the love of my life staring at me whenever I'm on the dance floor, at my table or everytime I'm approached by a hot, naked stranger. I wanted to go talk to him or say hi or something SO badly but Benny wouldn't kept his mouth off him. It's technically true cos he kept speaking to (or at) Remi but Remi's eyes were focused on me. I was so nervous I didn't even dare to look up and when I did, I didn't smile, neither did he. We just looked at each other for a long time. Gosh I love you.

You see me winding and grinding up on the floor. You know I see you looking at me and I already know...

Arthur was my "date" that night and lemme tell you how funny he was. I was grooving up to the music at the table holding Adele and he shot me a very fierce look asking, "I thought you were my date for the night." And I quickly peeled myself off Adele and danced with him instead. Haha, poor guy was kinda sick to enjoy himself to the fullest or he'd had a blast.

Jeaney and Adele made a new friend in less than 30 minutes, this cute and outrageously gay guy who kept dancing like a freakin machine invited them to the stage and screamed his lungs off trying to get attention of the people his kind. Jeaney had that whatthefug look on her face every time he screamed at her. They pulled me up too and due to my height the speaker was right behind my head. It couldn't get any louder, trust me.

Funny parts:

1) Naked guy tried dirty dancing with me on stage but I didn't play along. Remi was watching.
2) Noel went to the dance floor and stood right beside us but couldn't recognize us.
3) Adele got touched near her breast by a passerby.
4) Jovie was mistaken as a man by some of the gay dudes and got her arse grabbed.
5) I met a friend I knew from a competition and we danced together intimately until his boyfriend did the "uh hum" thing.
6) I got my ass grabbed at least 5 times, only 3 frontal grabs but they didn't feel good either.
7) I got my back rubbed by the boobs of trannies but I spoke to them in Cantonese and they backed off
8) Someone asked, "Are you going to get a drink or I'll have to get you one?" while I was waiting alone at the bar while the girls went into the restroom.
9) The ladies room was "unisex". And straight/gay couples make out there.
10) The gents was just men but there was no door attached to the stalls so you'll have to do all your business with the room watching you, and yes, they do.
11) I went into the "unisex" room finding Jovie and pushed the door open with a straight couple making out.
12) I was asked by a stranger why I was holding such a big jacket, which I replied "I'm afraid of the cold" and he felt me up and said, "you're afraid of the cold with the body of yours?" and dragged me to the dance floor. He tried to take off my shirt when I was dancing and when he was at it and thought I was too, he said, "I'm tired, let's go take a rest at the restroom." And I replied, "I'm not tired, why don't you go rest yourself?" And I went back to dancing with my friends.
13) The squats I do everyday paid off because man, I could shake.
14) Remi left without saying goodbye. Or without going up onto the floor the whole night for the matter.
15) Adele kept checking out this ultra toned and yummy *no puns intended* guy and he caught her staring every now and then. But she kept checking him out. Lmao.

All in all, I would go again because of the good music and awesome crowd. And a lot of my straight friends are asking me to bring them there but I guess we'll have to wait until at least next month because I'm fresh out of money. Spent half of my month's allowance in less than 5 days. And my phone bill has miraculously gone up to RM300. Holy fuck.

I was lucky enough to win RM300 extra for taking part in the Watson's Health & Beauty Campus Personality contest. All I did was singing a song and filling up some papers. And I've got RM388 worth of Bio-Life products. And all my homies are gonna get it cos I'm not a fan of health products although the stuff I have in my room right this second worth more than RM10,000.

So yeah, who wants to go gay clubbing somewhere near the end of the month? XD I don't think there's a chance I see Remi again though. I should've just gone up to him and kissed him in front of that bitch. Fuck, I'm evil. Ahhhhhhhhhhh!

And ooh! I get to be on the creative team of the PR event and I'll be the "multitasker" as I'm chosen to be the emcee of the event too. Woots! I can't wait to stand beside Cheryl Samad or whoever celebrity they got and comment on their fugly hair. Nah, I totally adore her. Maybe I'll comment on Jien's big tummy if we can get him to co-host. Haha. Never liked that guy too much.

Call me vain but I'm spending a lot of time with friends to get my mind off the whole "I can't find someone new cos I still love someone old" thing and the "someone old" just HAD to show up at my first gay club to make life easier. Damn. But then again, I'm enjoying life with a bunch of great friends so.. can't be too greedy right? And who wants to go to Redang? :">

Till then, cya guys around. Wish me luck at yet another competition. I seriously need the money. Haha.