Die, Bitch, Die.

I woke up extra early today and headed to college because I was helping out at the MAPCU education fair in PWTC. And no, I have no idea what MAPCU stands for and no, I do not think that it has anything to do with the ice-cream brand. Apparently Vikesh is back in Malacca and Tsu was not free today probably because she needs to keep texting Kesh every five seconds to see if he's talking to another girl *yesh I'm being a jealous ex* and Patrick had gone back to wherever on earth he comes from. Could be Johore. Could be Kedah. Could be Texas. Okay, maybe not really Texas. Scratch that, not at all. So it was only me and Alistair.

And I took a twenty-second nap in the student council room after finding out that we're only leaving to KL in an hour time. I spent the other fifty-nine-minutes-and-fourty-seconds fooling around with Chicken Litt.. I mean, Jeremy, and Jacky. Hmm, I just realised that they're both J people. And I also found out that Hannah Tan is actually my senior in the KDU Mass Comm. And I read an ultra funny article on how incredibly dumb malay subtitles can be when it comes to english movies as well as tv series.

Pirates Of The Carribean: Lanun-Lanun Dari Caribian
Spiderman: Lelaki Labah-labah
Date Movie: Filem Tarikh
One Tree Hill: Satu Pokok Bukit
Desperate Housewives: Tetangga Rumah Yg Amat Memerlukan
South Park: Teman Selatan

Anyway, once we got to PWTC, we realised that we were two hours late from the scheduled time because the person in charge didn't tell the KDU management people the time or some sort. Nah, none of my business I guess. But the truth is, there wasn't a lot of people. Relatively quiet, okay extremely quiet, compared to the previous education fairs. I worked my ass off during the last one and today I was on my ass for most of the time talking to Jacky, Jeremy and Alistair. And for those who doesn't know, Alistair's mid name is Noel, and I teased him about carrying a bible around his neck because he was wearing a nametag. I lost mine.

"Find the light, find the light that you used to know
Let memories touch your soul of all your deepest hopes
Shine a light, shine a light that you used to hold..."

**The album I'm listening to: Simon Webbe, "Grace"**

We were so free that I started taking pictures of everyone, alistair and the KDU marketting staff, cool people, mostly ;) We had great fun talking about our pasts and funny little stories that made everyone laugh out loud. Hmm, yes, Eric, I'm full of shit, but if I can make others feel happy and bring a smile to their faces, I don't care if they think I'm a joke-sputtering dumbass. But you? You're full of shit but you can't make people feel remotely comfortable when they're with you and they would still think you are a dumbass. And I hope you die. At this very moment, I seriously do.

Moving on, I went to One Utama with Jacky and Ms Lim after "work". It was pretty funny because Jacky was actually fetching me home and suddenly she had to turn back to KDU to pick up Ms Lim and then suddenly we decided to go to OneUtama. Btw, Jacky's last name is Loo. So I went out with two Ms L's.. Ugh, anyway, when we got there we decided to watch a Chinese New Year themed movie, that imo turned into a huge disappointment. Seriously, how am I supposed to gain confidence in HK movies if they keep giving me this kind of rubbish? It was hardly funny at all and the gay jokes just fell flat when they used it after the three-hundred-and-seventy-sixth time. Finished the popcorn even before the movie started because there were five hundred movie previews and ads. Ms Loo paid for the drinks and the snacks. Thanks Ms Loo!

We went to Murni's after the movie. Had Hawaiian Special and Milo Ice. Ms Lim paid for most of the food. Thanks Ms Lim!

And by the way, we got our feet massaged at the Osim iSqueeze Spot the thing is it actually worked cos we felt much better. Here are the photos if you have a fetish for smelly feet.

"We won't stop till try..
Seize the day, change your life..
Different ways, brand new highs.."

Simon Webbe sings good shizz y'all. And here comes your nightmare because I'm going to talk about my problems again. Proceed if only you're bored or concerned.

I've never felt so cheated in my entire life. It's like the past few months I'd been inside something that is actually not there. Loving someone who doesn't see me as who I am but who he thinks I should NOT be. Swallowing my own ego and taking every criticism and telling myself everything will be okay. And last night I had a phonecall from hell, figuratively speaking of course, and it made me realize a lot more than I had bargained for. Yes, I am the kind of person who gives others the impression that I'm a very "up-there" mothereffer, but once they approach me I'd turn into a down-to-earth mode" which is a system I'm pretty happy with. But in some fuckers *pardon my french* opinion, I'm the kind of person who gives people really good impression like I am really capable of doing things and shit but once they get to know me they would find out that I'm a useless retard that is not capable of doing anything.

THAT IS THE BIGGEST INSULT I HAVE EVER GOT IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. I have never ever in my LIFE be so completely disappointed with someone. "Oh I know I'm cute and hot because practically everybody tells me the same thing that I'm getting bored of it." Lick my dog's ass. Which wouldn't surprise me if you did.

Beauty shines from within, outer beauty might take your breath away but once people get to know you? You are simply one fucking dickhead. A turn off. I've always stood up for you. All you seventeen ex's said that you're the biggest slut ever and I said, "No, Eric is just confused and lost. He is a good person." Which I now admit, might as well just be the most stupidest thing I can ever do. Backing you up will do no good unless you can make a change a start thinking more like a human and less like a pig's vagina. Yes, you heard me.

I can't believe I loved you with all my heart. If you'd excuse me, I need to go throw up now.

*there was something wrong with the server, photos will be posted later*