I shifted my gaze from my uncle to the sapphire stones dangling right above my aunt's ample chest, wondering why they had been so captivating. The gemstones were humongous, and they must have worthed thousands, resting against her cleavage.
"What do you like to do?" Pursued my other uncle, who smoked before entering the restaurant. He looked older than his siblings, who I was related to by blood. He smokes. I told myself, making an additional mental note not to smoke however much pressure I'm given.
I want to be famous. I thought silently.
*
I woke up today (11th February) at 8:07am before the alarm went off. I tried to grasp the remnants of my dreams, breathing slowly yet telling myself not to drift back into another slumber, which would possibly result with me failing to be punctual for class. I had a dream of myself being a news reporter, interviewing pretty girls at an aircraft exhibition held at somewhere that looked like a cabin for planes. I even got into a helicopter.
College was nothing out of the ordinary today. My film group was given back the assessment for our midterm assignment and we scored a proud 28/30. Of course, we weren't satisfied. I wasn't sure if it was a good thing to pursue every last bit of perfection, but it has gotten me this far. After settling down, we were given a film to watch and we were told to act out a short play based on what we had seen in the film. I didn't enjoy the movie, romance was an issue. I'm in no position to talk about romance. I still don't cry watching romantic movies with dreadfully pulling dialogues, I wonder if I am immune to them.
Had lunch with friends and paid half of my attention to the conversation among the Finnish students and that one Malaysian dude with long hair. He put on an unimpressive accent that reminded me of Bacon. Or Baron. I laughed inward, realizing that the slightest grin on my face would alert the Sunsilk user that I was overhearing quite a few of his boring remarks regarding the Asian culture.
Do I sound like that when I talk? Do I annoy people around me because I'm loud and that I have an accent that comes unnaturally?
I walked home with a melancholy of winds in my heart. Knowing that I would not be able to make it back to Ipoh on Valentine's. I do have valid reasons not to go back for the annual home party, an occasion that I have never ever missed in my 21 years of life. I had a news report due on Wednesday that I had yet to start. I needed to know what to do for the class play and I am moving out of this house at last to stay with another friend. You don't even want to take the bus back. No, I didn't. But I don't want to be in KL on Valentine's Day either.
A friend was asking me to meet up with him on MSN. He said he would really like to hang out. I was attracted to him once, in a weird way.
"Of course!"
"But my boyfriend will be here as well."
"Oh, so?"
"But he's leaving 2 days before me in case you want to go somewhere."
"We'll just make plans when you're here then."
"Sure baby."
Don't call me baby.
Adele called soon after I decided not to reply this somewhat horny acquaintance. She needed a favor, one that I was happy to oblige even though I was feeling drowsy after all that thinking. I was somewhere else during the class movie.
I reached home exhausted, but had a phonecall from my aunt telling me that she was on her way. Fuck it. "Okay then, I'll be ready when you're here!" I hated being cheerful when I'm not feeling all that jolly. But there are a lot of times where you need to be so vain in order to maintain a certain social decency. My future job would require a lot of maintenance in social decency, I wonder how I will turn out to be.
I nodded blindly as my aunt was telling me how bad the traffic would have been if we had departed later than our time. She was telling me about her sister's husband. The man with the head of white hair that I would eventually meet was actually one of the senior manager of IGM.
"What's IGM?"
"Aiyo, you don't know IGM ar? People hear got IGM house tong tong go and buy lo!" Aunt May said excitedly. I wasn't sure if her enthusiasm was sincere as her husband was an architect as well. And tong tong means everyone. All. Something like that.
"Oh, so he makes a lot of money huh?"
"Later you see la!"
I reached the neighborhood of the rich and famous in Klang. Huge houses that would require at least 5 maids to be properly taken care of. I had not know that my relatives were well off at all. I knew some of them were. I just didn't know that my ayi (aunt) had marry a rich man. I had not seen them in 15 years. The only thing I remembered was that I used to stand on the table as they cheered for me to sing.
"Hi Kevin! Welcome!" My aunt came to me with a firm handshake.
"Hi ayi. Happy New Year." Standard, I know.
"You look just like your father?!"
"Oh really?" Chinese are used to asking rhetorical question. I did not expect her to say 'really' or point of the parts of me that resembled my dad.
"You should sing for us!" Why are they so excited? New Year?
"I don't think I can la. Sore throat." It was true. It's back.
I greeted uncles I had not meet before and also aunts who smiled at me without possibly knowing what I was doing in the house. Aunt May was less than considerate when she asked me to address them one by one. I did the greeting with hesitation, stopping ever so slightly when I see changes in their faces that indicated that I was rude enough to forget who they were even though they remembered me.
I stared blankly into the screen of the plasma TV as the chatter began. Damn, they are rich. I remembered a story of a boy seeing a red sports car flew by on the streets.
"Dad, look at them."
"What is it?"
"They must be rich, but they mustn't be happy."
"The person who says that, mustn't have much in his pocket."
The IGM uncle brought out Haegan Daz ice-cream for the kids and served me with Vodka Orange in a crystal glass. I was not in a position to judge but the conversation was getting interesting to not pay attention to.
"Girl ar, don't spin that chair la, later spoil."
"I think we need new chairs."
"Just throw this away la, I think I bought it for only RM1000."
"Hey sis, you should buy an Osim. The cheapest one is only RM9000."
"No, I sat on the world's most comfortable chair once. It's RM20000, I'd rather have that."
There was a wave of laughter. I wasn't sure if they were happy or being sarcastic.
"Wa, so long never come to your house, got so many statues already hor?"
"Yeah, his sir name is Ma, that's why he has miniature horses all over the house."
"How about this ox?"
"Oh, that was given by a friend. You want you can take it."
"No la, putting an ox in the house would mean that you will work like an ox. That's bad feng shui. And there's already a lot of things in my house. I would not have a place to put this thing."
"Look at this, my friend gave it to me as well."
"Does it come from an elephant?"
"No, that would be illegal. It's the horn of a rhino."
"How much did you get it for?"
"It's a gift, but I guess you can get it for a few thousand bucks la."
I quietly enjoyed my Ferrero chocolates as I watch them, amused. And then we went for dinner after the youngest sister and her husband arrived half an hour late.
*
"I want to be a TV broadcaster." I do.
"Oh, you still studying now right? Got work part time?"
"He emcees events for big companies you know!" said Aunt May.
"Wa, next time can see you on TV."
"You should ask him to host the annual dinner too."
"Do you think you can do it Kevin?"
"I always do my best when it comes to hosting events."
"I like your spirit."
The dishes came out on after another. Seafood after seafood. The place was renowned for its infamous curry noodles. I almost died eating it. But I had two bowls because it was simply too good to have just one. Then came fried taufu. A fish. Prawns. Abolone. Mushrooms with broccoli. Eggs with oyster. Vegetable. Another fish. Friend chicken. Crab. I've never had a normal dinner with more than six dishes before. I was almost full at the forth.
"Kevin, eat this." Said the youngest aunt who sported a short hairdo as she placed a slab of fish on my plate. It was a part of a Stingray. I threw up the last time I ate it.
"Hmm, delicious." I chewed on it vigorously, trying to drown out the taste and the smooth texture rolling on my tongue.
"Have you had any of this?" She placed eggs and oyester on my plate.
I've always find it awkward to have things put in my plate without the prior acknowledgment of whether I liked the food or not. So I made a metal note of not puking and braced myself as I put the oyster in my mouth. Shivering ever so slightly as the taste stimulated my taste buds. I downed the remaining between my teeth with more Vodka Apple, it didn't taste like apple at all. If anything it was peachy. And I've never been a fan of peaches.
I had three bottles of Vodka fruit, thinking that 5% per bottle would do no harm to my body, and had more oyster, prawns, crab as my plate was reluctantly filled with them. At the end of the dinner when they asked me why I stopped eating crabs, I revealed to them a patch of rashes on my arms. And I told myself to resist yet another urge to drink more. Even though my face was turning a bit red.
"Kevin, can you drink?"
"He should be able to drink! He'll be an emcee! He needs to love booze."
"I have a little bit of allergy."
The youngest aunt beside me moved herself an inch away, scared that the rash would be hazardously contagious. I pretended not to notice. I would have been freaked out if someone beside me broke out with an arm of redness. I excused myself and went to the washroom. It didn't help. So I sat back down and remained quiet as I watched the sons and daughters of my grandmother's sister talked about their endeavors.
I didn't sing in front of everyone that night. But I did in the car on the way back to the song the radio was playing. I sang it in the karaoke the last time I went. Bern sang it too.
Once upon a time I was falling in love
Now I'm only falling apart
Nothing I can do, it's a total eclipse of the heart
I should have given you a reason to stay,
Kevin C.
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